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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26864359">Gate of Dreaming</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_Lee/pseuds/Luna_Lee'>Luna_Lee</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Body Horror, Changing Tenses, Experimental Style, Fourth Shinobi War, GaaLee Bingo 2020, Implied Sexual Content, Infinite Tsukuyomi, Inspired by Music, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, One-Sided Attraction, Stream of Consciousness, unreality</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 01:00:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>27,893</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26864359</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_Lee/pseuds/Luna_Lee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The world was bathed in a red light, soft like rose petals, but not quite pleasant. Not quite peaceful. The red light hid something sinister within, but the world over no one was awake to notice.</p><p>High above, the moon bled.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gaara/Rock Lee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>GaaLee Bingo</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Gate of Dreaming</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I started this fic last summer, I think? And left it to sit at 2k words, only thinking about it from time to time because I was working on TAoL or because I just dropped out of fandom to focus on some other things. However, this fic sort of became the thing I hyper-focused on the first weekend of September, and I decided I needed to post something new <s>because I don't have enough WIPs people are waiting for updates on</s>--at that point, I hadn't posted my horror fic because this was before the start of GaaLee Bingo, and I was honestly just chasing the euphoria of having another completed work on the tail end of finishing Kadō. </p><p>But that being said, I had been really excited about this idea and I'm excited to have it finished. This is... very different from my usual stuff because it's a bit more experimental in terms of the narration. We've got tense changes! Also, playing around with some of the canon mythos surrounding the Infinite Tsukuyomi and the God Tree. Completely doing away with the Otsutsuki because I just think it's really dumb to throw something like that in at the end of a series--especially one as long as Naruto. </p><p>So, with all that in mind, just know that the rules surrounding both the Tsukuyomi and the God Tree are <em>slightly</em> different for the purposes of this fic.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>  <b>Something I’d also like people to keep in mind is that the nature of this fic is that nothing in it is real and even certain actions don’t actually occur, however within the implied sexual content there is still a complicated sort of element regarding consent. Again: sex is never actually had, but the nature of the scenes could still be potentially triggering for someone, so please be careful while reading</b></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Also this fic was inspired by the song <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E6GX0Zf4FMI">100 Years by Florence+The Machine</a> and because I'm posting this fic during GaaLee Bingo and this fic fulfills many of the prompts, it is now also for GaaLee Bingo! The prompt for this could be any number of things, but I'm going to use 'Gates' officially and maybe I'll be lucky and it'll actually lead to a bingo for me in the long run!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>"We have no need to fight<br/>
We raise our voices and let our hearts take flight<br/>
Get higher than those planes can fly<br/>
Where the stars do not take sides</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Then it's just too much, I cannot get you close enough<br/>
A hundred arms, a hundred years, you can always find me here<br/>
And lord, don't let me break this, let me hold you lightly<br/>
Give me arms to pray with instead of ones that hold too tightly</em>
</p><p><em>And then it's just too much, the streets, they still run with blood<br/>
A hundred arms, a hundred years, you can always find me here<br/>
And lord, don't let me break this, let me hold you lightly<br/>
Give me arms to pray with instead of ones that hold too tightly"</em><br/>
-<em>100 Years</em>, Florence+The Machine</p><p>The world was bathed in a red light, soft like rose petals, but not quite pleasant. Not quite peaceful. The red light hid something sinister within, but the world over no one was awake to notice. </p><p>High above, the moon bled. </p><p>The red light pulsed, rippling over everything—over forests and deserts and oceans; over towns and cities and countries; over thriving ports and barren wastelands; over the battlefield where the dead and the living had clashed. </p><p>The dead had turned to ash as the moon bled, even the one who'd activated the Infinite Tsukuyomi crumbled, his body scattering on the wind. As the moon's rays touched down and engulfed the world, the fighting stopped; spots of light fell on the living combatants, until eventually all had been taken by the light. The battlefield became a bed as people collapsed, falling into dreams, falling into the waiting arms of the roots of the God Tree. </p><p>Everyone fell. No one was spared. </p><p>And humanity slept. </p><p>Humanity will sleep. </p><p>Humanity sleeps. </p><p>				__________________________________</p><p>Lee laughs as Neji collapses, finally defeated. </p><p>“I... I won?” Lee asks no one in particular. Behind him, Sakura giggles. </p><p>“Oh, Lee-san,” she says directly in his ear, leaning so close to him that her chest presses against his upper arm. Lee feels warm all over, and he stares down at her with a beaming smile, trying to keep his embarrassment from his face. “You truly are splendid.” </p><p>She kisses him. </p><p>It's a vague feeling of pressure and warmth against his mouth. It almost doesn't feel real. Lee is caught off guard by the feeling, but also by her choice to kiss him. Elation still spikes within, sitting low inside of him; hot and bright. </p><p>He pulls away and gives an excited shout. “I have finally proven myself to be a true genius of hard work!” He turns back to Sakura. “And I have finally proven myself worthy of you, Sakura-san?” It is a question, one that stirs something reluctant inside of him. He wonders if he actually wants the answer after all these years. </p><p>Perhaps the dream of her is more enticing than the reality of her. </p><p>Something pulses, a red light at his periphery, but Lee ignores it as the green of Sakura's eyes becomes overwhelming. Had they always been so bright? </p><p>“Lee-san, I love you,” she whispers. </p><p>Lee feels colder than he should at her confession. “I love you, too! With all the passion and fervor of my youth!” </p><p>Sakura's eyes are so, so green. </p><p>Lee doesn't remember leaving the training field, but they are in his bedroom and night has fallen. Outside, the moon is full and as red as a rose. Lee frowns at the moon, aware that something is not quite right, but Sakura's hand is on his chest and another hand is at his cheek, forcing him to look back into her green, green eyes. </p><p>“Lee-san,” she breathes, close to his mouth. “Kiss me.”</p><p>Lee hesitates. He has thought of Sakura in so many beautiful, loving ways, but he has never thought past that precious, precarious moment where she might finally tell him how deeply she loves him; he's never thought past that first glorious kiss. He has dreamed of this moment in the quiet, dark of his slumber but he has always tried to keep his waking thoughts pure. This moment is coming too quickly on the heels of her confession, this moment should be careful and tender and slow, as he always dreamed it would be. </p><p>The light from the moon pulses within his room, catching his eye. </p><p>“Sakura-san, I do not know if—”</p><p>She places a finger to his lips. “Shhh, this is what you want, isn't it? This is what you've always wanted.” </p><p>“But... something does not feel right.” </p><p>Sakura's eyes burn, the luscious green of them giving way to crimson. “How can you say that? I thought you loved me.” </p><p>She is upset, but the emotion behind her words doesn't feel like Sakura. It is hollow, artificial. Even the voice doesn't sound like Sakura's anymore. </p><p>“Sakura-san,” he says, hesitant. “I have dreamed—” there is a pulse of red light that feels like something screaming against Lee's skin— “for many years, but I... I think we should wait. Do you—do you not agree?” </p><p>Sakura leans closer, the soft smell of her crowding him like a cloud crowding the top of a mountain. She smells like plants, like grass and leaves and the bark of a tree—there is nothing human in her scent, nothing made of flesh and blood. “Oh, Lee-san, you're a true romantic.”</p><p>He is a romantic. He has always been a bit too caught up with the idea of love. Perhaps that is what he has been chasing. The idea of love. The dream of love. </p><p>Sakura's visage shudders, something red and blinding in Lee's eyes. He stumbles back onto his bed, blinking the light away. He looks past Sakura to his window where the moon sits in perfect view, full and bleeding above Konoha. </p><p>“This is not right,” he whispers. “Sakura-san, wait.” </p><p>He touches her arm as she leans forward to kiss him and, though he wants to stop her, he falls into the kiss. It is soft, but the tang of blood coats his tongue. He kisses her anyways, tangling fingers in her hair as she climbs on top of him, as she pulls him close. </p><p>“Lee-san, tell me you love me.” </p><p>He opens his mouth, but the words do not come. </p><p>He loves her. </p><p>He will love her.</p><p>He did love her. </p><p>Once upon a time. But now? That is but an old dream. </p><p>Lee's vision went black for a moment, barely a second. He shook himself, looking back up into Sakura's too-green eyes. “I am so sorry, Sakura-san, but I—I do not know if I do.” </p><p>An ear piercing sound filled the room. Sudden and biting, and Lee clamped his hands over his ears, jostling Sakura from him. The world shuddered around him as he tried to protect his ears, and a moment later, the sound faded to nothing but an ominous silence. </p><p>“Did you hear that?” he asked, lowering his hands carefully. </p><p>“Hear what?” Sakura's eyes were still too green as they focused on him, intent and predatory. </p><p>A burning sensation, like ice and fire, pierced Lee's forehead, directly at the center. He cried out, his hands flying to his head as he fell from his bed. The pain was searing, blinding, all consuming. </p><p>Somewhere, everywhere, no where a voice spoke. Then more voices. And more. And more until Lee could hardly decipher words. </p><p>
  <em>“—the last to bear—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I love—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Your friend is here—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—stronger than—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Sasuke.”</em>
</p><p>Lee screamed, scrambling across the floor to his bathroom. Behind him, Sakura called, her voice unaffected. “Lee-san, don't you love me?” </p><p>He barely registered her words over the din inside his head, which felt as though it were splitting in two. If he could just get to his bathroom, if he could just find one of his painkillers he'd be okay. His vision was blurred by tears, but he managed to reach his bathroom and hoist himself bodily up from the floor. He peeled his eyes open, his vision as red as the moon, and faced his reflection. He screamed, stumbling back in horror. </p><p>In the middle of his forehead an eye blinked back at him. The iris was red, the same shade Sakura's had flashed, and it was embedded into his forehead on its side, so that his forehead looked as though it were being cleaved down the middle. From the corners of the eye, blood welled, trailing down the center of his face and around his nose, until all he could smell was iron.  </p><p>
  <em>“Don't you want to live your dreams?”</em>
</p><p>Lee's vision swam. His head spun.</p><p>“This... is a genjutsu,” he managed. Breaking a genjutsu had never been his forte. He swallowed his pain and fear, swallowed his doubts. He had to break free of this. </p><p>“Lee-san.” Sakura's voice didn't sound like her voice anymore. <em>“Come dream of me.”</em></p><p>“No,” Lee ground out, clenching his hands around the base of his sink until it cracked. He thought he heard another crack from one of his teeth as he clenched his jaw a hair too tight, but the pain in his forehead was too overwhelming for him to be sure. </p><p>“I will not dream of you,” he whispered, meeting that red eye's gaze in his mirror. </p><p><em>“You have dreamed of me,”</em> a voice whispered. <em>“You will dream of me.”</em> </p><p>“I will <em>not</em>.” </p><p><em>“You</em> are <em>dreaming of me.</em>”</p><p>Lee wakes to the soft caress of the morning sunlight against his skin. He is naked beneath sheets and Sakura is pressed against his side, her face hidden in the crook of his neck. His hand shoots to his forehead as a vague memory fights its way to the surface of his mind. There is nothing there but smooth skin. </p><p>He carefully sits up, doing his best to keep Sakura from jostling. His room looks the same, save for the clothes strewn about the floor. He frowns at the green of his jumpsuit, trying to remember the night before. He should remember it, but he doesn't. The details are not blurry or vague, they are missing. It is as though nothing had happened at all. </p><p>Sakura makes a soft, sleepy sound, shifting beside him. He quickly ducks into his bathroom, not ready to face her after a night he cannot remember. </p><p>Had he accidentally ingested alcohol? </p><p>He approaches his mirror carefully, afraid of what he might see, but his reflection is as it always is. There is nothing different about him. From the corner of his eye, something red shimmers. He sucks in a breath, turning slowly to stare at the closed bathroom door.</p><p>There is nothing there. </p><p>He forces his heart back to its normal rhythm as he turns the shower on. </p><p>“What happened last night?” </p><p>Despite waking up with Sakura beside him, Lee cannot find it in himself to be happy. He is confused and concerned, and petrified beneath all that. There is something vague and terrifying at the edge of his memory, something he wants, in equal parts, to face and avoid. He steps into his shower before he can summon the courage to face it, but promises himself he's not avoiding it either. </p><p>He's just waiting. </p><p>“What are you waiting for?” </p><p>Lee opens his eyes, looking around. </p><p>He's standing in the open field of training ground three, and Neji is standing across from him, his expression composed but his eyes glinting. </p><p>A memory flashes—blood and death, a gnarled root impaling a chest—and bile rises in his throat. </p><p>“Ne-Neji?” he chokes, tears brimming in his eyes at the sight of his friend, though he can't say why.</p><p>“Are you ready?” </p><p>Lee shakes his head. “What—what are we doing?” </p><p>Neji rolls his eyes. The gesture is familiar and comforting, but something in Lee screams that it shouldn't be. He thinks of eyes rolling up into heads, dead and empty, and he wants to vomit. </p><p>“I thought you wanted to go all out?” Neji asks. He doesn't sound like himself. “You said you had a move that would finally get the better of me.” </p><p>Lee doesn't remember that. He doesn't remember anything except blood on his hands and he knows without a shadow of a doubt that it's Neji's blood. “I—you died.” </p><p>Neji snorts, a careful and practiced gesture that barely belies his amusement. “I'm standing right here, Lee.” </p><p>Lee shakes his head again, taking a step back. A vision crashes around him, interrupting the moment. All he can see for a split second is Neji's corpse. He stumbles, grief bubbling in his throat as his vision clears. The darkness fades, the battlefield disappears, and Neji is alive and whole. But he knows. </p><p>He will know. </p><p>He knew. </p><p>He coughed, spitting bile onto the grass as Neji stepped forward. </p><p>“Let's go all out, Lee.” </p><p>Lee wouldn't give in. If this was a genjutsu, he couldn't waste another moment within it. </p><p>Taking no chances, he opened the First Gate and bolted, cracking the earth beneath his feet as he took off. Around him, the world spun, colors bleeding together like spilled paints, and a sudden, burning pain ignited at the center of his forehead while voices roared in his ears, a cacophony that he couldn't outrun. </p><p>
  <em>“—friend is here.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—the greatest weapons' master—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I love you, Hinata.”</em>
</p><p>Lee screamed, trying desperately to drown out the voices to no avail. The world flickered, a violent barrage of images and colors, and he closed his eyes against it and the searing pain in his head. He ran with everything he had, as weightless as though he were flying. If he kept running like this, eventually he would destroy buildings and trees—unless he wasn't moving at all, unless his body was trapped elsewhere, while his mind fought. </p><p>
  <em>“—as Hokage—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—a prodigy—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—you're a hero—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—marriage.” </em>
</p><p>Lee came to a sudden halt. The earth should have cracked beneath him, but it didn't. He was still standing in the field, staring across at Neji, who was alive and impatient as only Neji could be. </p><p>“You are dead.” Lee's heart was in his throat as he spoke the words. Neji had only just died, and it still didn't feel real. It couldn't be real. He knew it was, he knew <em>that</em> hadn't been a genjutsu, but he wished it were. </p><p>Neji chuckled. “We'll see about that.” </p><p>“No, Neji, this is not real. You died. You—the war—”</p><p>“What war?” </p><p>“The one we are fighting! The one—the one that—” Had they lost? Was this the outcome of their failure? Why was he arguing with the figment of illusion? That wasn't going to break him free of this genjutsu, that wasn't going to bring Neji back. </p><p>“Why are you fighting this?” </p><p>Lee looked up, staring at his dead friend as if he could see through to the ghost he'd become. “I—”</p><p>“You know you can't win. You've never been good at breaking genjutsu.” </p><p>Lee's blood boiled, anger and frustration mounting. “You are not my friend.” </p><p>Neji laughed, the whites of his eyes swirling with the red of blood. “I never was. I never will be.” </p><p>“Shut up!” Lee covered his ears and closed his eyes, trying to keep the vision from penetrating his mind. If he didn't look into Neji's eyes, he was sure he could break free. </p><p><em>“I was never your friend,”</em> Neji said in a voice that wasn't his at all. <em>“I will never be your friend. I am not your friend, Rock Lee.”</em> </p><p>The earth shakes, sending Lee falling to his knees, and when he opens his eyes he is lying on his back in a familiar field. A log rests before him, its bark flaking and several cracks on one side of it. </p><p>“That was excellent!” Gai's familiar voice booms behind him. </p><p>Lee sits up, looking around in confusion. “Where is Neji?” </p><p>The world pulsates, the red night sky shimmering with stars as Gai leans over him, smiling toothily. “Come, my beloved pupil! Let's start again! This time, I will show you a technique not even Neji could perform!” </p><p>Lee shakes his head as if to protest. Gai has shown him so many things, has taught him everything he knows. What more could he have to show Lee? </p><p>“This technique will be truly stupendous! Why, every kunoichi will throw herself at your feet when she sees what you can do!” </p><p>Gai has never spoken like this. He has never shown Lee anything for the sake of winning over a girl, and though he has always supported Lee's desire to defeat Neji in battle, this does not feel right.</p><p>There is a cold, stark memory clawing at the back of his mind—Gai engulfed in flames, Gai fighting with such inhumane speed and strength his body couldn't last, Gai as a god among men but more mortal than any man—and Lee's hands begin to shake. </p><p>“Gai-sensei, you—your leg—”</p><p>“Don't think on it!” Gai's eyes are as red as the flames in Lee's memory. </p><p>Lee scrambles to his feet, scrambles away from Gai until his back hits the log now at his back. “Gai-sensei—”</p><p><em>“What is it you want?”</em> Gai's eyes are narrowed, his expression like nothing Lee has ever seen before. </p><p>“What—what is going on?” </p><p>The red moon trembles, its light growing steadily brighter until Lee can hardly stand to look at it. It is brighter than the sun, and he squints against its light, holding his hands before his face to shield his eyes, but the red light seeps through everything, even flesh and bone. Gai begins to melt, disappearing as if still engulfed by the flames Lee recalls. </p><p>“Gai-sensei!” </p><p>“Lee-san! There you are.” </p><p>Lee whirls around, his heart racing for reasons he cannot remember. He is cold, his skin is clammy and covered in sweat, and his body trembles. He doesn't remember why. </p><p>“Sa-Sakura-san?” He is standing just outside the Yamanaka flower shop. A bouquet of red flowers is in his hands, though he doesn't remember purchasing them. The centers of the flowers seem to watch him, little eyes rolling around in the sockets of petals. </p><p>“Are those for me?” Sakura leans forward, close to Lee, right into his personal space. </p><p>This isn't real. </p><p>“What are you doing here?” </p><p>Sakura giggles, placing her hands on her hips in mock annoyance. “Silly, don't tell me you forgot about our first date.”</p><p>He wouldn't forget something like that. “How—when—”</p><p>“You must have hit your head harder than I thought yesterday? Going all out with Naruto like that—”</p><p>“Naruto-kun?” </p><p>“I'm still so impressed you beat him,” Sakura says, a dainty sigh escaping her. This isn't her. This doesn't make sense. </p><p>“Sakura-san, I never—”</p><p>“Oh, don't be modest! Everyone's talking about how splendid you are. The Beautiful Blue Beast defeats the Hero of Konoha—”</p><p>“I did not—”</p><p><em>“Why won't you accept this?”</em> Sakura's voice is filled with harmonics, cold and ear-piercing. Her hands are around Lee's face, fingers digging into his temples until he's sure the skin will break and his skull will crack.</p><p>“Let me go!” </p><p>A sound like glass breaking echoes around them as Lee shoves Sakura. </p><p>The sound ripples around him. </p><p>The sound will ripple. </p><p>The sound rippled. </p><p>Lee's hands shook, drenched in the deep crimson of blood, though it smelled nothing like iron. Instead, it smelled of earth, of mulch, of rotting leaves. He looked up, his eyes brimming with red-tinted tears, to find Sakura staring at him, a hole in her chest and her face twisted like a kaleidoscope. She stood frozen, a hazy visage like dreams slipping from memory after waking. </p><p>“You are not real.” </p><p><em>“I'm real,”</em> a voice, fractured and slow, echoed from everywhere and no where. It was not Sakura's voice, yet it was her voice. It was every voice, of every person he'd ever known. </p><p>Within the gaping hole of her chest, something moved—not organs and blood, but a familiar figure. </p><p>“—friend is here.” </p><p>“Okay!”</p><p>Lee took a step closer, wary that the fragments of Sakura might move again to attack. The kaleidoscope of her face shifted, swirling in on itself, but the haze around her did not solidify. The hole at her chest crumbled further at its edges, her body flaking like the skin of a tree. </p><p>He inched closer, his gaze snapping up to her swirling face and then back to the gaping hole, a window into another world. </p><p>“Don't be out too late!” </p><p>“Okay!” </p><p>Lee peered through the window, the whole just large enough for his head to fit through to get a clear view if he was so daring. </p><p>Behind him, he heard the world shriek, but within Sakura the world was quiet, almost peaceful. The sound of children playing and laughing echoed from the cavity of her chest, and a blue sky stretched beyond the horizon within her. Lee swallowed, taking a deep breath before taking the plunge. </p><p>“Gaara, come on!” </p><p>A young Naruto raced down an unfamiliar street, kicking up dust as he went. Behind him, a red-haired child ran to catch up with him, a smile on his face. </p><p>Lee hadn't known Gaara this young, but he was unmistakable—even without the scar on his forehead. </p><p>He pulled his head from Sakura's chest—the hole was growing by the minute, stretching beyond her so that there was a rip in the fabric of the world. As he straightened, the world shimmered, vibrated, undulated like a living thing. Everything bled red. </p><p>Everything will bleed red. </p><p>Everything bleeds red. </p><p>Lee wakes in his bed, naked and warm. Sakura is pressed against his side, quietly sleeping with one hand against his chest. He frowns down at her, trying to remember the dream he'd woken from and the world seems to spin in response. The dream—there is an odd thrumming around him—is vague and hazy at the edge of his memory, but he knows Sakura was there. </p><p>He shifts beside her, wrapping his arm around her, touching her hair, her face, her neck. She sighs in her sleep, a content sound. </p><p>It doesn't feel real. It doesn't feel right. </p><p>Carefully, Lee pulls himself from beneath her, searching for his clothes. He doesn't remember what transpired the night before, what led them to his room and his bed, but he doesn't feel hungover so he doubts he'd accidentally drunk alcohol. He is usually incredibly careful about that, besides. </p><p>In the bathroom, he turns his shower on, still trying to chase the remnants of his dream. Around him, the world trembles, like the aftershock of an earthquake. He decides he doesn't need to worry. It had just been a dream, after all. </p><p>Silence. The world does not stir, and he steps into the shower to wash himself from the night's activities, though he doesn't remember them and his body doesn't feel spent. He doesn't feel much of anything. He does feel content, though. And wrong. </p><p>He closes his eyes against this thought, leaning his head against the wall of his shower while the water sluices across his back. The blackness of his eyelids is brimming with red—like blood, like roses, like red hair. </p><p>“—Gaara—”</p><p>He jerks at the sound, whirling beneath the waterfall where he is training. </p><p>“Hello?” </p><p>“Rock Lee.” </p><p>The Kazekage stands at the bank of the lake, peering at Lee, his expression one of deep confusion that ripples against his usual blank countenance. </p><p>Except, it is not the Kazekage's body that's waiting for him. It is someone else, someone hazy and unformed, while in the space where their face ought to be the Kazekage peers through a shattered window of the world. </p><p>“Kazekage-sama?” Is Lee dreaming? </p><p>Above him the moon howls, red dripping from its craters and raining upon Lee. The waterfall burns, its water bloodied and steaming. </p><p>“Rock Lee, what—”</p><p>The Kazekage disappears, shimmering out of view, leaving only a vibrant blue sky behind him, breaking up the forest around Lee and the red sky above him. He stares into the hole of his world, stares into where Gaara had just been, but when he blinks, the world shifts. </p><p>He opens his eyes to see his ceiling and Sakura above him. She is removing her top, and Lee scrambles to sitting, gently shoving at her. </p><p>“What—Sakura-san?” He looks around, frantic and confused, his face burning.</p><p>There is a hole in his wall that shows a familiar desert village. </p><p>“Kazekage-sama?” he calls, rising from his bed. For whatever reason, he knows Gaara will be there.  </p><p>“Lee-san, where are you going?” Sakura reaches for him, her hand taking his and stopping him from approaching the tear in reality. </p><p>Her skin is not soft. It feels rough, splintery, harsh. “How did—”</p><p>It is a dream. </p><p>The world pulsates, red spider-webbing towards the break in his wall. Lee tears himself from Sakura, running to the wall of his room, but it moves out of his reach and keeps moving. He feels as though he is moving through honey or wearing the heaviest weights imaginable. He pushes himself forward, arms pumping and legs driving him forward, but he still isn't moving. The wall doesn't get closer. </p><p>“This is a dream,” he grinds out, and there is a high, ear-piercing shriek. </p><p>He opens a gate—the Second, something tells him. </p><p>He will open the gate. </p><p>He opened the second gate with such force he fell, tripping and stumbling into the wall like a calamity. The hole breaks further, cracks spreading and the wall of his room crumbling. </p><p>“I remember—”</p><p><em>“There is nothing to remember,”</em> a voice hissed. </p><p>A sudden pain took him, and he clenched his teeth, his jaw tight as he fought against the spiking pain in his head. At the center of his forehead the flesh tore, something clawing from out of his mind. He clamped a hand to his head, shouting in pain as he clawed at the thing. Blood dripped into his eyes, making his vision burn. He needed to remember, he had to remember. </p><p>“—gonna lose!” Laughter sounded from within the hole in his wall, pulling Lee's attention back to it. He panted, pushing himself up and crawling towards the hole. If he could just get through, if he could just find someone to help him... Pain radiated from his forehead as he touched the crumbling edge of the hole. It was big enough that he could almost fit his shoulders through it. </p><p>“Tag your it!” More laughter echoed from within the other world, and Lee steadied himself, pushing past overwhelming pain and nausea, before sticking his head through. </p><p>Two children—both familiar—ran down a desert street, laughing raucously. </p><p>Lee had never seen Gaara look so carefree. </p><p>A memory flashed in his mind—blood; a battlefield; Gaara, exhausted and dirty; Gai on fire; Neji impaled on the root of a tree—making his head ache all the more. He felt as though his head were going to split in two at any moment. He clutched his forehead, touched the bloody thing at the center of his forehead, shoved his finger in it until he thought he would die from the pain. </p><p>The world around him pulsed and the hole crumbled until he fell forward into the dirt. </p><p>The pain disappeared as quickly as if it had never been. </p><p>“I'm gonna catch you, ya know!” </p><p>Lee rolled onto his back, staring at the gaping hole he'd fallen through, back into his own world which was consumed in a red light. The ragged edges of his reality were as sharp as knives, and when he looked at his arms, they were shredded, the skin peeled back and bleeding. It hurt in a vague way, the way vivid dreams could hurt without truly hurting.</p><p>There was a scuffling sound down the road. At the other end, the two children were rolling in the dirt. </p><p>“No fair! You cheated!” </p><p>“Did not, ya know!” Naruto let out a crackling laughter, jumping from the ground and racing down the street. He by-passed Lee as though he weren't there, while Gaara struggled to his feet, pouting. </p><p>“He-hello?” Lee called. “Um, Gaara-kun?” </p><p>Gaara froze, his gaze lifting slowly to meet Lee's. His gaze fell on the tattered sleeves of Lee's suit and bandages, on the blood and hanging flesh. </p><p>Lee tried to hide his hands behind his back, but it was too late. Gaara had already seen and his eyes filled with the tears of a frightened child. </p><p>“I—I didn't mean it,” Gaara whimpered. “I-I'm so-sorry!” </p><p>Lee quickly got to his feet, carefully approaching. “Please do not cry. It—it is okay! You did not do anything, honest!” </p><p>“I-I did! It's all my fault! I-I wanted to k-k-k—to <em>kill</em> you! I'm—I'm a monster—”</p><p>Above them, the sky turned red and the sun-bright moon began to spin hypnotically. </p><p>“You are not a monster,” Lee said, anxiously watching the moon. “Please, Gaara-kun, listen. I am your friend.” </p><p>Gaara hiccuped, small and distraught, but the word 'friend' seemed to calm him. He looked up at Lee with wide eyes, rubbing at his tear-stained face. “Y-you are?” </p><p>“Yes! Of course, I am! We—we are very good friends, in fact! We write letters to each other all the time!” </p><p>Gaara scuffed his foot against the dirt, a timid smile worming its way onto his little face. “I'm glad.” </p><p>“Me too!” Lee assured. Gaara still hadn't noticed the sky or the moon, but it was only a matter of time. The blood red sky was bleeding into the village, falling like snow upon the desert around them. </p><p>“Do you wanna play with us?” Gaara asked, expectant and hopeful. </p><p>“Um, actually,” Lee began, searching for the best way to explain their situation. An idea—as brilliant as any genius could come up with—dawned on him. “Yes! Would you like to play make-believe?” </p><p>“I wanted to play tag,” Gaara pouted.</p><p>“We could play tag!” Lee hastened. “We could—we could play tag <em>and</em> make-believe!” </p><p>“How?”</p><p>“We can pretend to be—to be things. Like you are the Kazekage—”</p><p>The child before him flickered. For a moment, he was the Kazekage Lee knew, but it didn't last long. Around them, the world gave a warning growl. </p><p>“Um, so you are the Kazekage,” Lee went on, hoping to bring Gaara back to himself.</p><p>“My dad's the Kazekage,” the child Gaara was corrected Lee. </p><p>“Of course, but this is make-believe, right? So you can be the Kazekage!” </p><p>Gaara shifted again, growing to his adult size and features, his expression awash with confusion and recognition. “Rock Lee...” </p><p>“Kazekage-sama!” Lee could have cried. “It really is you!” </p><p>“What's going on?” </p><p>The world shrieked. </p><p>“The war! I think we have lost or—or maybe we are just trapped—”</p><p>“The war?” Gaara repeated, his expression one of subtle question. His eyes raked Lee's face, traveling down to his arms which were still bleeding. “You're hurt.” </p><p>“It is unimportant,” Lee said, waving it aside. “It is part of the genjutsu. It does not hurt so much.” </p><p>The red of the world grew darker, falling more heavily around them, finally drawing Gaara's attention. He stared at the sky, at the moon, and understanding seemed to pass across his blank face. </p><p>“The Infinite Tsukuyomi,” he breathed. “Madara...” </p><p>“Yes!” Lee shouted, and the world roared around them.</p><p>“How did you get here?” Gaara asked over the din. </p><p>Lee covered his ears, searching the road for anywhere they could hide—if hiding was even possible in this world. </p><p>“I broke through,” Lee said. “I do not know how, though. I was—everything felt wrong, and then there was a hole in my dream—” At his feet the earth cracked. </p><p>“We need to get to safety,” Gaara said, waving his hands to summon his sand. </p><p>Nothing happened. </p><p>“Kazekage-sama, we are in a genjutsu! You cannot use ninjutsu here.” </p><p>“Shit,” Gaara cursed under his breath. “Where did you break through? We need to find someplace safe—”</p><p>“Is anywhere safe? We are trapped in a dream world! It will find us!” Lee pointed above them to the red moon, hanging lower in the sky, peering at them as it spun. “Do not look at it! It will pull us back in!” </p><p>Gaara narrowed his eyes at the moon, but his eyes did not turn red and nothing split his forehead open. “Let's go. Show me where you came through.” </p><p>“How—” Gaara brushed past Lee, making his way down the road Lee had come. </p><p>“Genjutsu are waking dreams,” Gaara said simply as though that were explanation enough. There was no sign of Naruto and the world was so red, Lee could hardly distinguish between the buildings and the skyline. The moon followed them as they walked, and a howl rent the air as the voices of many flooded Gaara's dream. </p><p>
  <em>“—you are my friend—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Naruto-kun, I love—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—the luckiest gamble—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—never again—”</em>
</p><p>“What is that?” Gaara asked, stopping short. </p><p>“I think it must be the others.” </p><p>“Are we the only ones awake?” </p><p>“I do not know,” Lee said quietly. He pointed up ahead. “There. That is where I came through.” </p><p>The hole had shrunk since he'd fallen through, red smoke swirling at its edges and repairing the damage. It was still large enough that Lee could fit his arm through, but it was getting smaller by the second. His upper arm, his skin began to smoke. </p><p>“We will need to break it again,” Lee said, hardly registering his singing skin. “I am not entirely sure how, though.” </p><p>“We can't use ninjutsu,” Gaara said thoughtful. “But you can use taijutsu.” </p><p>“I can try, but if this is a dream—”</p><p>“Don't you fight in your sleep?” </p><p>The moon fell against the world, sending shock waves through the earth. A red wave rose up over Suna, taller than the walls that kept her hidden and safe. It rose ever higher, so high it engulfed the sky, and then came crashing down. It tore through Suna, flooding her streets and washing away buildings. </p><p>“Hurry!” Gaara shouted as the waves raced towards them and more buildings crumbled around them.</p><p><em>“I. See. You.”</em> </p><p>Lee opened the Third Gate, pulled his fist back, and punched the hole in reality. </p><p>Everything shattered—the waves, the moon, the village—and Gaara and Lee tumbled into darkness. Lee reached out and grabbed Gaara's hand, determined not to lose him as they fell through space and illusion. </p><p>They kept falling. </p><p>They will keep falling. </p><p>They fall.</p><p>Lee gasps, throwing his head back against his pillow, while above him Sakura makes her own noise of pleasure. His head spins with the suddenness of sensation and the whisper of pain, but confusion rests at the forefront of his mind. </p><p>It is not Sakura that makes him dizzy, it is not Sakura that overwhelms his senses. </p><p>“Lee-san,” Sakura gasps, and he forces himself to look at her naked body. She glows at the edges, as though not fully formed, and her body moves like liquid over him. </p><p>“Rock Lee.” Another voice, a familiar tenor to his right, pulls his attention away from Sakura.</p><p>His hand is stretched out, reaching towards another standing at his bedside and he looks up into the Kazekage's face, as Sakura continues to make noises Lee wished she wouldn't. </p><p>The red moon outside undulates, dilates like pupils. </p><p>Lee is holding Gaara's hand for reasons he cannot fathom. </p><p>“Oh, Lee-san,” Sakura moans, and Lee is distinctly aware of the scene playing out before the Kazekage's eyes. </p><p>He scrambles to sit up, pulling Sakura off of him with one hand and trying to cover both of their modesty all at once. </p><p>“Ka-Kazekage-sama,” he manages to squeak. </p><p>“You need to wake up,” Gaara tells him. </p><p>“I-I beg your pardon!” Lee clutches the sheets against his groin, but when he looks down again he is still holding Gaara's hand, not the sheets tangled around his waist. His other arm is still around Sakura, who, for whatever reason, has not acknowledged the Kazekage's presence. </p><p>“This is a dream,” Gaara says slowly, making the world shudder. “You need to wake up.” </p><p>“I—you—excuse me for being so—so rude, but you need to leave!” How had the Kazekage even gotten into his room? How had Lee not noticed that their hands were entwined? </p><p>“Rock Lee, wake up.” Gaara leans closer, pulling Lee from Sakura, who is now watching Gaara with red eyes. </p><p><em>“Dream with me, Lee-san,”</em> Sakura says, but it is not her voice, and the words echo all around him. Sakura pulls at him, so that he is caught between waking and dreaming; caught between the Kazekage and the woman he'd once loved. </p><p>Once loved? </p><p>Lee's breath catches in his throat until it goes dry. He looks into Sakura's red eyes, then back into Gaara's green ones. </p><p>“What is going on?” </p><p>“The Infinite Tsukuyomi,” Gaara intones. “You have to remember.” </p><p>He does remember. </p><p>He will remember. </p><p>He remembered. </p><p>Lee snapped back to himself, mortified by his state of undress and what the Kazekage had witnessed between him and Sakura. </p><p>“Kaze—”</p><p>“Lee-san, don't stop,” Sakura moaned into his ear, touching his chest and pulling at him with too many hands to be human. </p><p>Lee yanked free of her grasp, falling into Gaara and sending them both toppling to the floor. The sheets, still tangled around him, pulled Sakura from the bed, too, and her hands pawed relentlessly at Lee as she fell on him. </p><p>“Get off!” Gaara growled, shoving Sakura away from them.</p><p>Lee held the sheet tight against himself, rising to his feet and pulling Gaara with him. He couldn't look Gaara in the eyes, but he managed a quiet, “Thank you.” </p><p>“It's nothing.”</p><p>“Lee-san—” Sakura whined. </p><p>“You are not real,” Lee snapped. </p><p>“Of course, I'm real. <em>I'm your dream.</em>” </p><p>“No,” Lee said. “You are not.” </p><p>Sakura disappeared in a red haze, the world screaming around her. </p><p>“We do not have much time,” Lee said, wrapping the sheet around himself like a dress.</p><p>“You have to let go of the things you want,” Gaara told him. “Otherwise, you'll get pulled back in.” </p><p>“How do you know that?” Lee asked, rummaging in his closet for a change of clothes. </p><p>“What are you doing?” </p><p>“Getting dressed,” Lee said, half exasperated. </p><p>“This isn't real,” Gaara pointed out. </p><p>“Yes, but I would still like to—oh.” Lee looked down to find himself clothed once again. “Right.” </p><p>“As long as you let go of what you want with her, that won't happen again.” </p><p>Lee flushed, hot with embarrassment. This was not a conversation he wanted to have with the Kazekage, especially not after what Gaara had just been witness to. “I would rather not discuss it, if that is all right with you.” </p><p>“It isn't,” Gaara snapped. “This genjutsu feeds on your desires.” </p><p>“But—how am I supposed to stop wanting things?” </p><p>“You have to if you want to keep your control over this world. You were better before, when we were in my dream.” </p><p>“Your dream?” </p><p>“You don't remember?” </p><p>“I—” Lee shook his head, trying to rack his brain for the memories. “No.”</p><p>“Then it's even more imperative you don't give in to the things you want. You have to remember what's happening—that we're in a genjutsu, that there's a war going on. You broke me free of my dream, I can try to keep you safe from yours.” </p><p>“Thank you, and um, I am sorry you had to see that.” </p><p>Gaara stared at Lee, non-pulsed. “There was nothing to see.” </p><p>Lee rolled his eyes. “I mean, I know it is not real—”</p><p>“You weren't having sex,” Gaara said, his tone bordering on exasperated. “Whatever she was doing to you, that was not intercourse.” </p><p>Lee flushed to the roots of his hair, his blood pounding in his ears. He avoided Gaara's gaze, stepping around him and dragging him to the door of his room. “It was still a compromising situation.” </p><p>Gaara's eyes bore into the back of Lee's head as he dragged him into the hall of his apartment, but he didn't answer, which Lee was grateful for. </p><p>“What other things do you want?” Gaara asked suddenly as the world around them shifted. They were walking in an open field, the sky painted red and the moon shining like the sun, tracking their movements. </p><p>“Why does that matter?” </p><p>“If I know, I can be prepared for what might pull you back in.” </p><p>That was a fair point, and none of the other desires he might have could possibly be so embarrassing. “I want to be a splendid ninja, known throughout the world for my taijutsu. And I would like to beat Neji.” </p><p>Neji's name made his chest feel tight. “I suppose that last one is easy enough to avoid. Neji is dead, after all.” </p><p>“I'm sorry,” Gaara murmured. He squeezed Lee's hand. </p><p>“I—I do not want to talk about it. We should—we should focus on breaking free.” </p><p>“Whatever you did to break into my dream is probably the answer.” </p><p>“I do not remember how I did that.” </p><p>“It was taijutsu—possibly the Gates. I heard you shout 'open' when you broke us free of my dream. You're able to fight in your sleep normally, so the genjutsu must not be able to keep you from physical activity.” </p><p>“But—how can I use that to get us out?” </p><p>“I wish I knew.” </p><p>They lapsed into silence, walking through the forest of Konoha, bathed in red light. There was no telling if anywhere was safe, but they walked on, idly searching, idly hoping that if they kept moving they could stay safe. </p><p>Hours seemed to pass in the forest, silence pressing in on them, only interrupted by the chaos of other dreams somehow leaking into Lee's. The canopy of the forest parted above them wherever they went, so that the moon could always watch them, but it had gone quiet, biding its time, waiting for Lee to drop his guard. </p><p>“Do you think we can find someplace where that cannot watch us?” Lee asked, nodding up at the moon. </p><p>“I doubt it.” Gaara met the moon's gaze, his own intent and unwavering. “This world molds itself to the moon's will.” </p><p>“But what about our will? Everything here is supposed to be what I want, right?” </p><p>“In a manner of speaking,” Gaara intoned. “But what we're capable of here is still dependent on the moon. If we could hide from it, perhaps we could escape this place.” </p><p>“What about your dream? What happened to it?” </p><p>“You killed it.” </p><p>Lee blanched, staring in horror at Gaara's profile. “I am so sorry.” </p><p>“Why?” Gaara asked frowning. “You saved me. Without that dream, I'm free of the moon's hold.” </p><p>“But—”</p><p>“Sentimentality has no place here. The dream wasn't real, and it wasn't something that could ever be achieved. My past has already been written, my future is all that matters.” </p><p>“Then you were dreaming about your past?” </p><p>“About a past that could never be. It hardly matters.” </p><p>“That is not true,” Lee said. “Whatever you were dreaming is important to you. Even if it can never be.” </p><p>Gaara didn't respond. He led them on, through the thick forest, marching towards an unreachable destination. </p><p>And on it went. They walked hand-in-hand with the moon watching them and the red sky dripping around them. Sometimes, Lee would see Neji or Sakura through the thick copse of trees, but Gaara always averted his gaze and brought him back to their reality. </p><p>It was never ending. </p><p>“How long do you think we have been trapped like this?” Lee asked. There was no telling how much time had passed—hours, days, weeks even. </p><p>“Time doesn't move here,” Gaara intoned. “We move forward, but we never grow tired or hungry. The sky hasn't changed, the moon hasn't moved, the season hasn't altered. But sometimes I feel the genjutsu weaken.” </p><p>“Really? Do you think others are fighting it?” </p><p>“Perhaps.” There was a thoughtful note in the tenor of his voice. “But I don't know. I've tried to see if there's a pattern to its weakening, but with everything the same here, there's no way of being sure.” </p><p>“But you have a theory?” </p><p>“The moon's phases.” </p><p>“Of course!” Lee nearly whooped with delight. “Then that means when there is a new moon, the genjutsu must be easier to break! Perhaps that is how I broke free and found you!” </p><p>“It's possible,” Gaara agreed. </p><p>Lee's excitement dwindled suddenly, a thought striking him. “But even if it is weak during a new moon, the genjutsu still has us trapped. How is that possible? If there is no moon, how can it still work?” </p><p>“The moon isn't gone,” Gaara said. “It's simply turned in such a way that it doesn't reflect light from the sun.” </p><p>“So the genjutsu can still affect us.” </p><p>“Correct. But I believe the phases of the moon still have an affect on the potency of the genjutsu.”</p><p>“What if we destroyed the moon?” </p><p>Gaara snorted a laugh, giving Lee a side-long look of amusement. “We can't destroy the moon. Doing that would throw the world into chaos. Besides, we'd still need to break free from the genjutsu to try such a thing.” </p><p>Lee flushed, embarrassed at his rash suggestion. “Oh, right, I—I knew that! I was only joking.” </p><p>“Of course you were. Although, if we destroyed <em>that</em> moon, we might be able to break free.” </p><p>“Does it look bigger than before?” </p><p>“I can never tell.” </p><p>Lee eyed the moon suspiciously, eyes narrowed against its red shine. </p><p>In the canopy, something moved, a dark shape descending from the trees. </p><p>“Lee, do you want to spar?” </p><p>Neji's attempts at distracting Lee had gotten old, and now Lee hardly needed Gaara's help in avoiding being pulled in by the lie. </p><p>“Sure, Neji,” he said, almost as blandly as Gaara might have. “Meet me at training ground three. I will be there shortly!” </p><p>The image of Neji faded into red mist. </p><p>“You've gotten better at that.” </p><p>“It is too easy to remember that Neji is dead,” Lee said quietly. He quickly shook away the sorrow, giving Gaara a thumbs up. “Plus, I have you here to help me! I think not being alone makes it easier to fight the genjutsu.” </p><p>“That makes sense. When you found me, your presence disrupted the dream I was trapped in, and once you woke me up, it was easy to stay awake.” </p><p>Lee tilted his head in curiosity. “How was it so easy for you to not give in? I mean, you have had to keep me from slipping up many times.” </p><p>“I don't know,” Gaara said flatly. “But I suspect it has something to do with not having to sleep under normal circumstances.” </p><p>Lee nodded, though he did not understand what that had to do with overcoming the Infinite Tsukuyomi. “Well, I am glad that you were the one I found.” </p><p>The world shifted around them, the forest twisting until the trees had become the streets of Konoha. </p><p>“What—” Lee whirled around, looking left and right, and up and down the road for any signs of another illusion-made person. “What is going on?” </p><p>“I don't know,” Gaara murmured. “But we should keep walking.” </p><p>“Is there any point?” Lee couldn't help but ask. They'd been walking for so long, and though he wasn't tired, he was sick of the same sights and the endless trek. If they could reach a destination, it might not have been so wretched, but Lee had grown bored of the forest.</p><p>“I think this may be my fault,” he said, realization dawning. </p><p>“How?” Gaara asked, narrowing his eyes at Lee. </p><p>“Well,” Lee began nervously. “I was just thinking how bored I was in the forest—” </p><p>Gaara let out an exasperated sigh. “As long as we don't run into Hyuuga Neji or Haruno Sakura, we should be safe.” </p><p>“Right!” Lee enthused, relieved that all he'd managed to do was change the scenery. </p><p>They walked on, hand-in-hand, silent and wary. Though the forest hadn't kept them safe from Neji's attempts at pulling Lee into a match or Sakura's embarrassing seduction tactics, the open streets of Konoha felt more vulnerable. The moon's gaze had been no less heavy in the forest, but still Lee felt more bare, more exposed within the heart of the village. </p><p>“Do you think we could sit down?” Lee asked.</p><p>“Don't tell me you're tired,” Gaara said, skeptically. </p><p>Lee laughed as though Gaara had delivered an incredibly funny joke, throwing his head back and, for a brief moment, enjoying himself. “No. I am just—well, we have been walking aimlessly for so long. Maybe we could just sit?” </p><p>“And I suppose you'll want lunch, too?”</p><p>Lee's embarrassment worked up his face and the back of his neck, but the small smile Gaara sent his way pulled his own answering smile from him. “Oh, very funny,” he laughed. “I know we cannot eat—or I suppose we <em>could</em>, but we do not need to.” </p><p>“But it would break up the monotony,” Gaara said, as if reading Lee's mind. </p><p>“Free ramen!” Teuchi called, Ichiraku materializing behind Lee. </p><p>“I wouldn't have thought you'd want to go here,” Gaara said as they ducked into the ramen shop.</p><p>“Why not? Teuchi-san makes excellent ramen!” </p><p>“Why thank you, Lee,” Teuchi said benignly, staring at Lee and Gaara's joined hands with red eyes. </p><p>Lee quickly dropped Gaara's hand, red in the face. “We should probably not hold hands here.” </p><p>“I don't think that's an option,” Gaara said, holding his and Lee's still joined hands up for Lee to see. </p><p>“But—what—I just let go!” </p><p>“I think it's how we're linked.”</p><p>“Oh. Well... that makes sense.” </p><p>“Does it bother you?” </p><p>“No, of course not!” Lee said far too quickly, casting an anxious look at Teuchi, who was still smiling benignly at them. </p><p>“It does.” </p><p>“No, really! It is—it is just that...” He had no reason to be nervous here, and explaining the unspoken rules of Konoha made shame crawl across his skin. Besides, he had no desire to bring attention to his own insecurities, lest Gaara decipher the deeper meaning for it. “Never mind! We should eat!” </p><p>“Here's your ramen, Lee! The spiciest I've made yet!” </p><p>“Thank you so much, Teuchi-san!” Lee said, taking his seat. Gaara followed suit, as another bowl was placed in front of him. </p><p>“It's gizzard,” Gaara noted, picking up a fried piece of gizzard with his chopstick. </p><p>“It is your favorite, right? I remembered from the last time I was in Suna.” </p><p>Gaara stared down at the morsel, his expression distant. “Thank you.” </p><p>“Think nothing of it!” Lee declared, digging into his own food. “Mhm! This really <em>is</em> your spiciest yet!” </p><p>Teuchi grinned, unnervingly polite, his red eyes shining. </p><p>“I do not think we need anything else,” Lee informed the specter and Teuchi vanished into red mist. The feeling of being watched didn't leave Lee, and when he glanced over his shoulder, he could see the moon peering through the shop's tapestry at them. </p><p>“There really is no way to get away from that thing,” Lee muttered, turning back to his food. It looked much less appetizing now. </p><p>“If you can learn to control your dream more, perhaps eventually you can hide us.” </p><p>“Do you really think so?” Lee had a hard time imagining being able to do such a thing. “I have never been particularly good at breaking through genjutsu.” </p><p>“But you were able to break through this one, at least enough to save me.” </p><p>“I wish I could remember what I did.” </p><p>“You don't remember anything?” </p><p>“The last thing I remember is....” Lee flushed. “Well, you know, that time with.... um, Sakura-san.” </p><p>“The dream erased your memory. Remembering must pose a threat to it.” </p><p>“Perhaps.” </p><p>“We'll figure it out. In the meantime, you should focus on altering the dream. If you can practice bending it to your will, there might be a way out.” </p><p>“I will do my best, Kazekage-sama!” </p><p>“You called me Gaara.” </p><p>Lee froze, a bite of ramen halfway to his mouth. “I—I beg your pardon?” </p><p>“When you were in my dream. You called me by my name. Like you used to when we were kids, before I was the Kazekage.” </p><p>“Oh, well, I—I do not remember doing that, but I must have had a good reason!” </p><p>“Why did you stop?” </p><p>“Stop? Stop what?” </p><p>“Calling me by my name.” </p><p>“Because of your position!” </p><p>Gaara stared down at his bowl of gizzard, his expression distant. “I don't have many friends—people outside of my family and village who care for me. Uzumaki Naruto is one of those people. You are the other.” </p><p>Lee would have smiled, but there was something mournful in Gaara's tone. Lee knew what it meant to be lonely, to be disliked and to not have friends, but unlike Gaara he hadn't been truly hated. No one had ever feared him.</p><p>“I am glad we are friends,” Lee told him, squeezing his hand gently.</p><p>“Then you should call me by my name.” </p><p>Lee did smile then. “Then you should just call me Lee, like my other friends.” </p><p>“Lee,” Gaara said quietly, as if trying it out for size. Lee was so used to hearing his full name from Gaara that it was almost strange to hear anything else. </p><p>He laughed, tickled by the strangeness of their situation and delighted by the closeness such informality created. There were far too few people—even fewer now—that Lee felt truly close to. Neji and Tenten had been so much more than teammates to him, but he'd always struggled at forging that closeness with others—too afraid of judgment and forced friendships; too afraid that others found him annoying and only put up with him because they were too nice to tell him anything else. </p><p>But Gaara had always been different from the rest of his peers. Gaara had always stood apart from others in every way. </p><p>If Lee had to be trapped with anyone, he was grateful it was Gaara of the Desert. </p><p>Eating within the genjutsu was a strange experience: neither of them were hungry and neither of them were full and their bowls never emptied. They could have sat there for hours or days eating endless bowls of ramen and gizzard, talking and laughing, their hands joined between them, their only link to one another. Eventually, it would get boring the way walking through the forest had, but for now it was a nice break, a chance to escape the monotony of a destinationless walk. </p><p>“It is really too bad we cannot train here,” Lee said after an hour or a day or a week of sitting in Ichiraku with only Gaara for company. Sakura had walked by once and stared at them with green, green eyes, but Lee had ignored her until she left. If she'd left, he hadn't actually checked, too absorbed in his conversation with Gaara to care about her.  </p><p>“We should be training our minds—yours more specifically.” </p><p>Lee frowned thoughtfully. “How do you propose I do that?” </p><p>“Try changing the weather,” Gaara suggested. </p><p>Lee closed his eyes, staring into the red void behind his eyelids, concentrating as best he could. </p><p>In the distance, he heard the odd static of rain falling. A gentle <em>hiss hiss hiss </em>, and beneath that he heard voices. </p><p><em>“—stronger than </em>him<em>—”</em></p><p>
  <em>“—alive.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—love you so—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—most beautiful—”</em>
</p><p><em>“—can't believe how—”</em> </p><p>Pain blossomed in his skull, splitting it down the middle and something warm ran down down the bridge of his nose. </p><p>“Lee—” a familiar voice said at his side, but it was so far away. He could hardly tell where he was, and everything was so, so red. </p><p>Everything will be so, so red. </p><p>Everything is so, so red. </p><p>Lee peels his eyes open with difficulty, but despite the pounding in his head, the rest of him feels fine. He pushes himself up, staring around the hospital in confusion. </p><p>“Wha—”</p><p>“You're awake!” Tenten shouts excitedly, throwing herself at him. </p><p>Lee hugs her with one arm, his other attached to an IV and immobile. He frowns around the room, still confused, and his head still pounding. “What—why am I here?” </p><p>Tenten's smile is so bright and so happy that Lee's concerns are almost dashed. “Silly! Your operation! It was a success!” </p><p>“My--” Lee stops to stare at his arm and leg. “But I have not needed surgery since the Chūnin exams!” </p><p>“Dummy.” Tenten grins so wide it almost looks unnatural, and her red eyes shine with such glee Lee is unnerved. “You can use ninjutsu!” </p><p>Lee's breath catches and his heart stops. In all his life, he's never considered the possibility that he could learn ninjutsu. He knows, without a shadow of a doubt, that he will always be impaired, different from other shinobi. And he accepts it, even revels in it sometimes because of how far he's come. He hasn't wanted to be like everyone else since he was very small, but a secret, dark part of him had never let go of the dream that someday he could be more than the hot-blooded loser he'd always been. </p><p>The moon shimmers outside his window, its red light soft and inviting in a new way. </p><p>“I can use... ninjutsu,” he says, flabbergasted. “I—are you—are you sure?” </p><p>He doesn't want to get his hopes up, but they already are. </p><p>“Yes! Sakura did it! I didn't think she could, but you're a lucky man, Rock Lee.” </p><p>Rock Lee. Why does that stir something in him?</p><p>Tenten never calls him by his full name. No one does—except the Kazekage. </p><p>“My head hurts,” he groans, leaning his head into his hands—his hand. His other arm is still in the bed, still attached to an IV, still stationary. He frowns down at his arm, staring at it from between his fingers. “I cannot move my hand.” </p><p>“Sakura's got you hooked up to painkillers and shit,” Tenten says offhandedly. “Once you're all healed up, you'll be fine.” </p><p>“When can I go home?” </p><p>“Quick to go out and practice ninjutsu, huh? Well, unfortunately, Sakura said you gotta wait. This was a delicate operation, after all. And I'm not gonna be the one to upset your wife.” </p><p>“Wife?” Lee repeats, lifting his head to stare at Tenten in shock. That's not right, he <em>knows</em> that isn't right. He knows that's not what he wants. </p><p>Tenten rolls her eyes. “Forgetfulness wasn't supposed to be a side effect of the surgery, you know.” </p><p>“I—I would not forget something like that,” Lee says, almost accusatory. “Who are you?” </p><p>Tenten rolls her eyes so far that her irises disappear into her head. She stares at Lee with only the red of her eyes, her smile growing wider by the second. <em>“You</em> are <em>getting strong.”</em> </p><p>“Lee! Wake up!” The Kazekage's voice is more desperate than Lee has ever heard him, even in battle.</p><p>Memories crash around him—battle. Bloodshed. Death. Fire. The moon—and it makes his head burn like molten fire, until he thinks he might combust from the heat and pain of it. His body knows only pain, knows only the agony he's in. The pain is beyond even the Sixth Gate. He feels as though his skin is being seared and his muscles stripped and his bones crushed into a fine powder. </p><p>Every sound is pain, every smell is pain, every taste is pain, every sensation is pain. Except for his hand. </p><p>Something warm and comforting squeezes his hand—another hand, both foreign and familiar. He knows that hand somehow, though he doesn't know why. He feels as though he's held that hand for so long that he could map every line of its palm and every crease of its knuckles. </p><p>“Lee, please, wake up.” He hears a voice through the haze of pain, and its like that voice is magic because the pain in his head lessens. </p><p>He sobs, but his body finally knows more than pain again, and he can hear his own agony and feel his own body through the blinding ache in his head. He gasps, opening his eyes to the harsh red lights of the hospital room, and finds the Kazekage staring at him, hovering over him, his expression tight with concern. </p><p>“Ka—Kazekage-sama?” he manages weakly. </p><p>Gaara closes his eyes, something wet and glistening upon his lashes. “Are you awake?” </p><p>“O-of course, I am. What—what kind of question is that?” Pain makes him blunt, makes him rude, but something about the sight of Gaara soothes him.</p><p>“Do you remember the war? Do you remember the Infinite Tsukuyomi?” </p><p>The moon makes a sound like a dying animal, but Lee remembers. </p><p>He will remember. </p><p>He remembered, and he never planned to forget again. </p><p>Lee gasped as the pain finally fled completely, his body singing its relief. He wiped at his eyes with his free hand, pushing himself to sit on one shaking arm. </p><p>“Why—why are we holding hands?” </p><p>“You don't remember anything?” </p><p>“I—the war. I remember now, but what is going on?” </p><p>“We're trapped in the Infinite Tsukuyomi, in your dream specifically.” </p><p>“How are you in my dream?” If this was all a dream, then was the Kazekage a part of it? Was Gaara real, or another trap within the genjutsu? </p><p>The hospital shook violently, the walls cracking around them. </p><p>“We need to go,” Lee said, pushing himself from the bed, setting aside his concerns about the Kazekage for now. “The hospital is—”</p><p>“It's fine,” Gaara countered as Lee pulled him into the hall. “It's the dream.” </p><p>“I do not understand.” </p><p>“It's a genjutsu. That's all. We've been trying to break free from it for—I don't know how long, but it pulled you back in. You were trying to control it, then all of a sudden—”</p><p>“Why would I do something like that? I cannot do genjutsu!” </p><p>“It's <em>your</em> dream we're trapped in. You were controlling little things, and we thought—I thought if you could control more you might be able to hide us.” </p><p>“Hide us?” </p><p>“From the moon,” Gaara said, nodding to the moon following them through the cracks in the walls of the hospital. </p><p>“That is what is controlling the genjutsu.” </p><p>“Yes.” </p><p>“Why are you not affected?” </p><p>“Because my dream was destroyed when you dragged me into yours.” </p><p>Lee stopped short, forcing Gaara to come to a halt beside him. “But if your dream was destroyed, then why did you not wake up? I mean, why is the genjutsu still affecting you at all?” </p><p>“I don't know. We'd need to break free of the genjutsu completely to see what's happening in the world.” </p><p>“How can we do that?” </p><p>“We don't know, Lee. We've been trying to figure it out.” </p><p>“Who? Who else is here?” Lee asked, looking around as if he expected others to appear. </p><p>“No one. It's just the two of us.” </p><p>“Then—does that mean—are the others okay?” </p><p>“We don't know. And we won't unless we can break free.” </p><p>“Then we have to! We have to save everyone—”</p><p>“We're trying!” Gaara snapped. “We've been trying, but we haven't been able to break free! Every time—every time you change things here, every time you fight it, it tightens its hold on you. This happened when you first brought me here. It trapped you in a dream with Haruno Sakura, and I broke you out of it—”</p><p>“Sakura-san,” Lee said quietly. “That is right. Tenten said she was my wife.” </p><p>“That wasn't Tenten, and Haruno Sakura isn't your wife.” </p><p>“No, of course not,” Lee said, prodding at the feeling sitting in his chest: relief. </p><p>“I'm sorry,” Gaara said, half exasperated. “I know this is difficult—”</p><p>“No, it is—it is really not. I am glad she is not my wife.” </p><p>Gaara came up short, staring at Lee. “Then why would the dream say she is?” </p><p>“I do not know,” Lee said with a shrug. “I mean, I used to have feelings for her. Maybe that is why?” </p><p>“You're changing,” Gaara said, as though this were an incredible revelation. “You're changing, but the dream hasn't realized.” </p><p>“Well, how could it?I did not realize until Tenten said I had married Sakura-san!” </p><p>“Before this dream, the last time you were pulled in, it was a dream of you two.” </p><p>“Of myself and Sakura-san?” </p><p>“Yes. You were in the midst of coitus, but you didn't seem to be enjoying it. I was able to break you out of the dream quickly—more quickly than this dream.” </p><p>Lee's face burned and he spluttered with his embarrassment. “You—you saw us—”</p><p>“We've been over this before: there was nothing to see,” Gaara said with a roll of his eyes, tugging at Lee's hand to get him walking through the crumbling hospital again. “But it's strange: that time it was easier to break you out of the dream. This time, you couldn't hear me calling your name at all. And then something happened, something must have triggered your memory or your awareness that something was wrong.” </p><p>“It was when Tenten called me by my full name. No one does that except you.” </p><p>Gaara's mouth twitched, an imperceptible smile at the corner of his lips. “You asked me to call you 'Lee' before this dream.” </p><p>“I did?”</p><p>“Yes, and you promised to call me by my name.” </p><p>“I did?” </p><p>“Yes, Lee.” Gaara's exasperation was almost fond, the way Neji or Tenten often sounded when he went off on a tangent about any number of things. </p><p>“I am sorry I forgot.” </p><p>“It's not your fault. Whenever you dream, you forget about everything before the dream. I can fill you in, but there isn't much to tell that I haven't already shared with you.” </p><p>“How long was I dreaming?” </p><p>“I don't know. There's no way for us to tell the passage of time here. I have no idea if we've been trapped like this for only a few minutes or if it's been years.” </p><p>“Y-years?” Lee blanched. “That—that could not possibly be the case! I am sure—I am absolutely sure it has not been years. We would—we would <em>die</em>!” </p><p>“There's no way of being sure. I know nothing of the Infinite Tsukuyomi or anything else that might have come from this jutsu. For all we know, it's sustaining us somehow.” </p><p>“Then—then we could be trapped here forever?” </p><p>“We won't be,” Gaara said quickly. “We just need to figure out how to escape.” </p><p>“But you said we have been trying and we have failed.” </p><p>“So far, yes, we have. But I haven't given up. Have you?” The challenge in Gaara's voice, subtle though it was, could not be missed. </p><p>“Absolutely not! I would never give up!” </p><p>“Good.” </p><p>“Where are we going?” </p><p>“No where,” Gaara said. “We can walk aimlessly and it won't lead us anywhere unless you want it to.” </p><p>“What do you mean?” </p><p>“It's your dream, so you control it. If you want to go someplace, that's where we'll be.” </p><p>“What about you?” </p><p>Gaara turned to Lee, his gaze curious. “What do you mean?” </p><p>“Where would you like to go?” </p><p>“I have no preferences. Unless we can find shelter from the moon, I do not care where we go.” </p><p>“How do we hide from the moon?” </p><p>“We don't.” </p><p>That did not offer Lee comfort, but there seemed to be little comfort in their situation. Apart from each other, they had nothing—no knowledge of the world outside the Infinite Tsukuyomi, no way of communicating with anyone, no other friends, no sure way out. Nothing. </p><p>Lee followed Gaara through the hospital, his mind drifting. The world shifted around them, swirling in on itself like water going down a drain. </p><p>They stood in a secret grove, a place Lee had discovered many years ago, hidden from the rest of the world, though not from the moon. </p><p>The moon hung above them, as red as ripe strawberries, but not nearly so sweet. </p><p>“Where is this place?” </p><p>“We are still in Konoha,” Lee said. “I used to come here when I was young to hide from the other kids when they would tease me and throw rocks at me.” </p><p>“They threw rocks at you?” Gaara repeated, his usual monotone colored with quiet surprise and disgust. </p><p>“I have never told anyone about that—I mean, Neji and Tenten know, of course, but I have not told anyone else.” </p><p>“I promise, your secret is safe with me.” </p><p>Lee met Gaara's gaze through the red mist that had settled around them, confused and comforted in equal measures. He and Gaara had been friends for many years, ever since Gaara had saved Lee from certain death at the hand's of a man wielding his own bones as weapons. But in all their years of friendship, Lee had never felt that they were close. Not truly close. </p><p>When Gaara had become the Kazekage, he'd felt even more out of Lee's reach. Why would the Kazeakge, the leader of an entire village, want to be friends with a foreign Genin who couldn't even use ninjutsu? They'd kept up their letter writing, of course, but Lee had always feared that their friendship was one-sided. </p><p>“This place is beautiful,” Gaara said, looking around at the flowers growing at their feet. </p><p>“There is a pond this way,” Lee told him, tugging his hand. “It is not safe from the moon here, but at least it is peaceful.”</p><p>“You'll need to keep your guard up,” Gaara warned him as they traipsed through the flowers. “Before your last dream, the dream was trying to pull you back in by using Hyuuga Neji—”</p><p>A stark painful memory flashed in Lee's mind. “He is dead.” </p><p>“Outside of the genjutsu, yes. But here, the dream will try and use him to trap you. He'll tempt you, try to ask you to fight him. You have to say no.”</p><p>“I think I can manage that.” </p><p>“You can,” Gaara assured him. “You did it before. I don't know how the genjutsu trapped you again, but the dream—”</p><p>“I could perform ninjutsu,” Lee whispered, equal parts heart-broken and relieved that it had all been a lie. </p><p>“Yes.” Gaara watched him carefully from the corner of his eye, quiet for a thoughtful beat. “It was a strong enough desire that you couldn't hear me.” </p><p>“I...” Lee didn't know what to say. It had been years since he'd talked about the difficulties he'd faced growing up as a child or that secret desire, that he'd thought he'd quashed, to use ninjutsu someday. </p><p>“Your taijustu is the reason I'm here,” Gaara told him quietly. </p><p>“It is?” </p><p>“I believe so. Somehow you broke whatever separated our dreams. But I can't use my sand here. I'm entirely useless.” </p><p>“That is not true!” Lee said, heated. “If not for you, I would still be in that hospital, convinced that I was recovering from surgery!” </p><p>“You would have figured it out eventually. I don't think I ever broke through the dream—not until you arrived.” </p><p>“But I am terrible at breaking genjutsu!” </p><p>“Yet somehow you may be our only hope of ending this nightmare.” </p><p>Around them, the world pulsated, thrumming like the heartbeat of a massive beast. </p><p>“I do not know,” Lee said evasively. “All I can do is taijutsu...” </p><p>“And that makes you far stronger than the rest of us. I could never do the things you do, I would never have become the Kazekage if not for my sand—”</p><p>“But—”</p><p>“You're an incredible shinobi, Lee. Whatever desire you have to be like the rest of us, let it go. I promise, you are far stronger without it.” </p><p>Lee knew Gaara meant every word—Gaara had never minced words and he'd never said anything he didn't want to say—but it was hard to believe that someone as powerful as Gaara could have such faith in him. A warm and pleasant feeling wormed its way into his chest, purring like a contented animal.</p><p>“I... had thought I did not still want that,” he admitted in hushed tones. The pond appeared before them, shimmering out of the red mist, as crystalline as Lee remembered. “I used to come here to hide, to train, to clear my head. I tried to walk on water here so many times—I always failed and went home soaking wet. But I thought someday, I would prove everyone wrong. Someday, I would be everything they said I could not be.” </p><p>“You are,” Gaara said, the whisper of his voice fervent. “You've proven everyone wrong. You proved me wrong.” </p><p>“How? You beat me, and I almost—”</p><p>“Lee, you were the first person to ever break through my sand,” Gaara said carefully, each word heavy with meaning. “No one had ever achieved that before you. No one. I thought our fight would be easy. I was unimpressed by you, bored, in fact. And then you did things I'd never seen anyone do, you accomplished something no one had ever done.” </p><p>“I guess that is true.” Lee couldn't help but smile. Though the memory of their fight had always been a harsh reminder of Lee's own failures, he looked at it now in a new light. They had always shied away from talking about their fight and that time in Gaara's life. For Lee, it had been preferable to having to discuss his own weaknesses. </p><p>“I wish you had told me that sooner,” Lee finally said. </p><p>Gaara looked away from him, staring across the pond's still surface. “I was ashamed.” </p><p>“What? Why?” </p><p>“I could have killed you, and I almost ruined your dream. I never thought we'd be friends, and I always feared that if I mentioned our match...” Gaara closed his eyes, letting out a shaky breath. “I thought the reminder would make you hate me all over again.” </p><p>“I never hated you.” Lee squeezed Gaara's hand, hoping to offer comfort. “It was a match to prove ourselves, I would not expect anyone to do less than their best.” </p><p>“But I tried to kill you. I <em>wanted</em> to kill you. And I went to your room after to do just that.” </p><p>“I had heard about that,” Lee admitted. “Naruto-kun told me.” </p><p>“Of course he did,” Gaara muttered. “When did he tell you?” </p><p>Lee frowned, trying to remember. “I do not recall, but it must have been before Sasuke-kun defected.”</p><p>“Then it was before we started writing to each other,” Gaara clarified, confusion heavy in his tone. “Why did you write me?” </p><p>“I wanted to be friends,” Lee said, as if that were the most obvious thing in the world.  </p><p>“Even after everything I'd done to you?” </p><p>“Gai-sensei always says that the strongest friendships are forged from the strongest hardships. And besides, you <em>did</em> save me, so it makes up for almost killing me!” </p><p>Gaara stared at Lee for a long moment, his mouth twitching into a small smile. He tore his gaze from Lee, shaking his head, a soft laugh escaping him. “You are singular in every way, Rock Lee.” </p><p>Lee flushed, that warm feeling worming deeper into his chest. “I could say the same about you, Kazekage-sama.” </p><p>“Gaara, remember?” </p><p>“Oh, of course. Gaara.” </p><p>It was an indescribable moment that stretched between them and around them, like the ripples of a pond, only ceaseless, unending. Time did not move, and so the quiet of the moment expanded, never contracting, never being disrupted, and never growing old. Lee felt the smooth plains of Gaara's hand in his as though it were an extension of himself, as though there were nothing so trivial as flesh and bone separating them. </p><p>He felt as though he'd known Gaara longer than six years, felt that he knew him better than years worth of letters could possibly account for, and he wondered at all the missing places in his memory that the dream had erased. How many conversations like this had they had? How many vulnerable moments had passed from Lee's memory? How much had the dream taken from him? </p><p>A chord in the distance snapped, like the breaking of a harp string, and Lee's head throbbed with memory. </p><p>He hunched over, gripping his skull as pain raced through his veins. </p><p>“Lee!” </p><p>“N-no, I—I am fine, I—I just remembered... I remembered something from before—from before the dream!” </p><p>Gaara stared at him, his eyes wide with shock and his lips partially parted in a quiet 'o' of surprise. “What did you remember?” </p><p>“Ichiraku. When you asked me to call you your name.” </p><p>For the first time in Lee's memory, Gaara smiled a real smile—not small and hidden, not tentative and unsure. It was awkward and strange on him, but it made him look carefree, like the child Lee had seen in Gaara's dream.</p><p>“And I remembered when I found you! When I found you in your dream! You were playing with Naruto-kun—Gaara, this is wonderful! I remember!” </p><p>“Do you remember how you broke into my dream?” Gaara asked quickly, his hand gripping Lee's tight. </p><p>Lee deflated, all excitement vanishing. “No. I—I am so sorry. I only remember there was a hole in the wall of my bedroom, and I went through it and found you.” </p><p>“How did you know it was my dream and not Uzumaki Naruto's?” </p><p>“We were in Suna,” Lee said. “And... I do not know. I guess I just knew. It felt like you.” </p><p>“How could a dream feel like me?” </p><p>“I do not know how to explain it. I suppose it is like intuition. When you just know something is because it is.” Lee shrugged, unable to look at Gaara, though he couldn't say why. </p><p>“I remember,” Gaara began quietly, when the silence had dragged on for too long, “when you arrived in my dream. I was playing with Uzumaki Naruto. We were children. It was the childhood I'd never had. But I wasn't happy. Not really. It wasn't real, and perhaps some part of me knew that—like intuition. </p><p>“And when you appeared on that street, I knew. I thought I was having a nightmare then, but you were kind to me.” </p><p>“You were just scared,” Lee remembered.</p><p>“Until now, I've only ever tried sleeping once—right after Shukaku was extracted. I had nightmares, horrible nightmares about the things I'd done. I destroyed half of my room in my sleep, and when I woke my ANBU were terrified. I thought the fear I'd known as a child would come back, that my people would hate me again. But they didn't. Just like you.” </p><p>“How could they hate you after everything you have done for them?” </p><p>“I wouldn't blame them if they had. I wouldn't blame you. I was a monster. There are still stories about me in Suna. The youngest children don't know the tales they share amongst each other are about me. As far as they know, it's just a scary story about an ancient monster.” </p><p>Lee squeezed Gaara's hand, a tightness in his chest. “I am so sorry.” </p><p>“Don't be. It's what I deserve.” </p><p>“I do not believe that.” </p><p>“You see the best in everyone, don't you, Rock Lee?” </p><p>“I thought you were calling me 'Lee' now?” he teased, bumping their shoulders together playfully. </p><p>Gaara managed a small smile, hinting at his sadness. “Habit.” </p><p>They lapsed into silence again. This time tinged with some unspoken sorrow that Lee wanted to chase away, though he could not fathom how. It seemed strange to him that Gaara should feel such guilt over their match all these years later, though he could understand how the lives he'd taken before haunted him. He wished there were a way to change that history; wished there were a way to rewrite Gaara's past so that he hadn't been hated; wished that he could go back in time and show Gaara kindness and friendship and love so that he'd never have to fear sleep again. </p><p>Before them, the world shimmered, like heat rising off the desert sands. At their backs, Lee's secret grove remained, but before them, Suna's streets appeared before them in a haze. A playground materialized, filled with children playing and laughing, and a small Gaara watched from the periphery of the playground, tentative and alone. </p><p>“What are you doing?” Gaara asked, his voice tight. </p><p>“I—I do not know—I am sorry!” Lee said, panicked. He hadn't intended to do anything, all he'd wanted was to make Gaara happy, to erase some of the pain in his heart. </p><p>“Lee, stop.” Gaara sounded wretched, his voice caught in his throat as though he might cry. </p><p>“I—I do not know how to make it stop!” Lee took a step back, his eyes brimming with frustrated tears. </p><p>At the playground, the child Gaara had been watched sadly as the other children played, and Lee was powerless to stop the scene from playing out—his own desire to heal Gaara somehow growing in strength until the vision was as solid as the two of them. </p><p>“What are you doing over here?” A tiny voice, familiar and startling spoke from within the vision. It was Lee as he'd been as a child. </p><p>Within the vision, Gaara had fallen to the ground, fear in his eyes. His sand cushioned his fall, and he scooted away on his backside, trying to put distance between himself and Rock Lee. “S-stay away from me. I'll hurt you!” </p><p>Lee laughed, jumping over the wall and crouching so that he was level with Gaara. “Why would you hurt me?” </p><p>“It—it's the sand,” Gaara whispered. The sand rose up like a serpent, hovering around Gaara almost protectively. </p><p>“I like your sand,” Lee said, reaching out to it with a tentative hand. He held his hand before it, as though it were a dog that needed to sniff him to determine whether he was a friend or not. “I wish I could do stuff like that. Then maybe the other kids would not be so mean to me.” </p><p>Gaara looked up at Lee with wide eyes. “They—they're mean to you?” </p><p>Lee nodded, pouting slightly, his cheek puffed up. “I try to ignore it, but sometimes it gets lonely.” </p><p>“I... understand.” Gaara's tiny hand clung to the fabric of his tunic, just over his heart. “I'm lonely too.” </p><p>Lee leaned closer, getting into Gaara's personal space. “Then we should be friends! We can keep each other from being lonely!” </p><p>Imagined though the vision was, the earnest child Lee had been was as real as the scars on his hands and arms. Tears welled in his eyes at the scene, and he squeezed Gaara's hand tight, as if to apologize for bringing this to life. However, at his side, Gaara had fallen silent, watching the scene unfold with wide, glassy eyes. </p><p>“It's like my dream,” Gaara said, as their child selves got up and ran off together. </p><p>“I am sorry I could not stop it.”</p><p>“Don't be,” Gaara said on a whisper. “You've gotten stronger, better at controlling things here. Besides... it was nice.” </p><p>“But it is not real.” </p><p>“No,” he agreed, but a smile was playing at the edge of his mouth. “But it feels real.” </p><p>“Your dream did not feel real.” </p><p>“This feels real because you want it.” </p><p>Lee felt exposed, as though he'd shared a long-kept secret by accident. This world was of his own making, but he had no control over when a whim would take shape or not, and this felt private; it felt like something he'd never have admitted to dreaming about. Gaara had said before that his past couldn't be altered, so what was this hidden desire going to accomplish? </p><p>Yet, for all that Gaara had insisted that his dreams of a childhood filled with love didn't matter, he seemed comforted by the vision. </p><p>“Do you think this would have happened?” Gaara asked as they watched Lee's re-writing of their childhoods unfold. </p><p>“If I had lived in Suna,” Lee said. “I would have wanted to be your friend.”</p><p>“You wouldn't have been scared of me?” </p><p>Lee couldn't help but laugh, almost self-deprecatingly. “I have never been good at listening to other people's warnings about—well, much of anything. The people at the orphanage always told me I would never be a shinobi, and all the other kids always teased me so much. But that never mattered. I knew what I wanted. I think I worked so hard out of spite, and if anyone had told me not to be your friend, I would have made sure not to listen.” </p><p>“Even if they'd said I was dangerous?” </p><p>“Especially if they had said you were dangerous,” Lee confirmed. “I would have seen it as a challenge, I think. And I think if I had seen someone like me—someone without friends—I would not want them to stay lonely.” </p><p>“I wish we'd met earlier, like this.” Gaara watched the younger version of Lee run up to his former self, smiling and laughing, a lizard in hand. </p><p>“Me too.” </p><p>“Maybe you could have saved me from becoming the monster everyone thought I was.” </p><p>“I would have done everything I could to help you.” </p><p>“My uncle,” Gaara said, his voice so quiet Lee almost missed the words. “It was my uncle trying to kill me that did it.” </p><p>“Your—your own uncle?” </p><p>“My father had ordered him to assassinate me. It failed. The other five attempts failed, too.” </p><p>Lee thought he was going to be sick. “You never told me.” </p><p>“It's not something I like to discuss.” </p><p>“I—” Lee struggled to find words adequate enough to express the depth of his sorrow. “If I had been your friend, I would have protected you.” </p><p>Gaara actually laughed at that, a low chuckle, simultaneously warm and derisive. “My sand was protection enough. Everyone who tried to hurt me wound up dead.” </p><p>“But—” Lee floundered. “We could have run away! We could have left Suna.” </p><p>Gaara shook his head, casting an amused look Lee's way. “A six and seven year old trying to survive in the desert? I don't think we would have gotten very far.” </p><p>“We could have tried, though!” Lee said, as though his determination alone could change their past. “We could have found someplace to hide and—we could have hunted for our own food!” </p><p>“It's a nice thought,” Gaara relented, his smile as warm as the desert mirage before them. “I appreciate it.” </p><p>Lee wanted, all at once, to lean forward and wrap his arms around Gaara; to touch his mouth with his, and memorize that smile by feel alone. He crushed the feeling down so quickly and so surely it almost hurt to do so, but around them, the world sang, quiet and sweet, like a lullaby.</p><p>“Are you doing that?” Gaara asked, looking around with narrowed eyes. </p><p>“I am not,” Lee said, moving closer to Gaara and squeezing his hand. “Something is very wrong.” </p><p>“Nothing is wrong, Lee-san,” Sakura's voice echoed from behind them. </p><p>Lee froze. He hadn't heard her voice in far too long, and it filled him with such dread he could hardly speak.</p><p>“Don't look at her.” </p><p>“Oh, it's not me you need to worry about,” Sakura said. “We've been watching you, Lee-san.” </p><p>“Who?” Lee couldn't help but ask. </p><p><em>“We,”</em> Sakura said, her voice echoing around them unnaturally. The moon had grown in size, so close to the canopy of the forest it nearly rested upon the leaves. The trees around them swirled, red sap dripping from their trunks and their leaves swaying as if in a trance. </p><p>“Gaara—”</p><p>When he turned, his hand was empty and Gaara was gone. </p><p>“Gaara?!” He whirled, turning every which way, desperate to find Gaara. </p><p>“And now you're all alone. What will you do? How will you fight this?” Sakura asked. </p><p>“GAARA!” Lee shouted urgently. He ran through the trees, his heart racing and his blood pumping wildly in his ears. “GAARA!!!!” </p><p>“Lee!” Gaara shouted, stumbling from behind a tree. He was bleeding from a wound in his side, and he fell to his knees. </p><p>“Gaara!” Lee raced to him, pulling him close. “What happened? What have they done to you?” </p><p>Gaara coughed, blood bubbling at the corner of his mouth. “I-I'm sorry, Lee.” </p><p>“Shh, do not speak like that,” Lee said, holding him close. He shoved Gaara's hand aside, trying to see the wound. “It—it is not so bad. I am sure I can—there must be—no, wait! This is not real! You are not hurt, remember? This is a dream, so it cannot be real and—and you will be fine!” Tears burned his eyes, making everything glow, hazy and red, except for Gaara's eyes which were so, so green. Had they always been that green? </p><p>“Do you remember what you have to do?” Gaara asked weakly, lifting a bloody hand to Lee's face. </p><p>Lee shook his head, fighting back tears. What was Gaara talking about? What was he supposed to remember? “W-what are you talking about? R-remember what?” </p><p>Gaara smiled, his eyes somehow even greener. “Good.” </p><p>The tears Lee cried stopped. “Good?” </p><p>“Forget with me, Lee.” </p><p>“You are not Gaara.” </p><p>“I am,” the phantom of Gaara whispered, gripping the side of Lee's face. “I'm the Gaara you want.” </p><p>“What—”</p><p>“We've been watching you, Rock Lee.” </p><p>The world spun and Gaara pulled Lee down for a kiss. </p><p>Gaara kissed Lee. </p><p>Gaara will kiss Lee. </p><p>Gaara kisses Lee. </p><p>Around him, the world is quiet and still. He sighs in contentment, stretching out languid as a cat in the summer sun. The morning moon hangs red and beautiful in the sky, begging him to wake. </p><p>“Five more minutes,” he murmurs, face pressed into the warmth of another body. </p><p>There is a deep chuckle, as content as Lee feels. “What about your training?” </p><p>“It can wait.” </p><p>“You've gotten lazy.” </p><p>Lee lifts himself up onto one arm to stare down at Gaara, who is watching him with sleepy eyes. Lee likes that Gaara sleeps with him, that he's able to chase away the nightmares that have kept Gaara from dreams his whole life. It makes him feel special. He is special. So very, very special. </p><p>“I will have you know, Kazekage-sama, that I do not know the meaning of the word 'lazy,'” Lee counters, playfully affronted. He drops a kiss on Gaara's chest, moving higher and higher until Gaara is forced to lean back to allow Lee access to his neck. </p><p>Gaara hums, practically purring. “Are you planning on proving to me how lazy you aren't? Or is this all talk?” </p><p>“I am a man of action,” Lee declares, before leaning forward and capturing Gaara's mouth in a deep kiss. </p><p>Gaara sighs into it, a smile on his face as he kisses Lee in kind.  </p><p>It is everything Lee never thought he'd dream of and more, and he falls deeper into the kiss as the world outside his window grows more vivid and saturated with color. The moon watches them, its gaze heavy and red. </p><p>“We should shower,” Lee murmurs into Gaara's hair, possibly hours later. The bed is more comfortable than it has any right to be and he doesn't think he can move, so he spends his time pressing idle kisses to the top of Gaara's head. </p><p>“Mhm,” Gaara hums. “I don't want to move.” </p><p>“You mean you cannot move.” </p><p>“And who's fault is that?” Gaara asks, looking up into Lee's face with eyes so green Lee feels like he's swimming in them.</p><p>“Your eyes are so green,” he whispers, brushing aside the fringe of Gaara's hair. They are so, so green, and they pull Lee deeper. </p><p>From incredibly far away, he hears Gaara shouting his name. </p><p>“Do you love me, Lee?” </p><p>“Of course,” Lee breathes against Gaara's mouth, as Gaara shouts his name, more desperate than before. </p><p>“How much?” </p><p>“More than anything.” </p><p>“More than the world?” </p><p>“More than the universe.” </p><p>Gaara chuckles, low and intoxicating as he catches Lee's mouth in another kiss. “Then you'll never leave me, right?” </p><p>“How could I?” </p><p>“You'll stay here forever.” </p><p>“Much longer.” </p><p>Gaara's skin is so soft it feels almost unreal, like rose petals. Lee runs his fingers hungrily over the skin of Gaara's back, pulling him closer, but it never feels close enough. He tangles his hands in Gaara's hair, the strands of which are thick and soft and smell like leaves. He kisses Gaara deeper, and it feels like he's falling into an abyss. </p><p>“LEE!” </p><p>Lee jolts, jostling Gaara against him as he sits bolt upright in their bed. His heart is pounding and his head is ringing with the desperate sound of his name on Gaara's lips. </p><p>“Are you all right?” Lee asks, holding Gaara's face in his hand. Gaara's eyes are greener than they have ever been.</p><p>“I'm perfect,” he whispers, placing a kiss against Lee's mouth. “I'm with you, after all.” </p><p>“I thought I heard—”</p><p>“Thinking? Are you calling me a bad kisser?” </p><p>Lee laughs, shaking his head with amusement. “No, never.” </p><p>“I don't know, that's what it sounded like.” </p><p>“Shall you prove me wrong, then?” </p><p>“With pleasure.” </p><p>Something pulls at Lee's hand, so hard it actually hurts and he yelps into Gaara's mouth. He blinks, his head pounding despite the fact that his arm is what should hurt. </p><p>“Lee, look at me,” Gaara demands, pressing another kiss to his face, trying to get Lee to look into his green, green eyes. </p><p>“I—I am so sorry, my head,” he closes his eyes, gripping his head with his free hand. His other hand is outstretched, reaching beyond the bed to something else. Lee doesn't understand why, because he thought both his hands had been full with Gaara in his arms. </p><p>“Lee,” Gaara repeats again. </p><p>“LEE!” Gaara shouts at the same time. </p><p>Lee's head feels like it's splitting in two, and he groans, dizzy with the ache in his skull. “I do not feel well, Gaara.” </p><p>“Look. At. Me.” </p><p>“Don't look at him!” Gaara's voice is so desperate and so strange. It doesn't sound like him. It doesn't sound like the Gaara Lee's been kissing.</p><p>“Lee, I love you.” </p><p>“No, Lee, don't listen to him. Listen to me. Please, I'm begging you.” </p><p>Lee closes his eyes tighter against the intrusion; against the pounding, sheering pain in his head; against the brilliant, violent red pounding beyond his eyelids. </p><p>“Lee—”</p><p>“Lee—”</p><p>
  <em>“—the best ev—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—like never before—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“—bu—”</em>
</p><p>“STOP!” </p><p>Lee tumbles from the bed, falling onto his hands and knees, and vomiting. He coughs, spit dribbling from his mouth and chin as bile burns his throat. He groans, woozy and disoriented, and rises to his feet, stumbling, naked, towards the bathroom. </p><p>“Lee, look at me.” </p><p>He doesn't know which Gaara is speaking—the one in his bed or the one in his mind—but he doesn't look. He falls against the sink in his bathroom, turning the water on and splashing his face and rinsing his mouth. He's never felt so awful in all his life—not even after the first Chūnin exams. </p><p>A sound like nails on metal rends the air and he slaps his hands over his ears, his skull splitting. In the mirror, his reflection is distorted, but he can make out a blood-red eye in the middle of his forehead, and he screams. </p><p>“Lee!” Arms wrap around him, familiar and real, and he feels more grounded than he has in—how long has he felt like this? Days? Months? Years? </p><p>He trembles in a strong embrace, his entire body shaking as he sobs against a body that smells like sand. </p><p>“Everything hurts,” he whimpers. He is used to pain, but not like this. </p><p>“I know,” Gaara whispers. “You have to fight it, Lee. You have to wake up.” </p><p>“I am awake.”</p><p>“Not yet, but almost.” </p><p>Slowly, Lee climbs. </p><p>Lee will climb. </p><p>Lee climbed out from the dream, from the green of Gaara's eyes, from the pleasure of his kiss, like a man climbing from his grave.</p><p>“Are you with me?” Gaara asked. The real Gaara, not the dream. </p><p>Lee wanted to cry. He couldn't face Gaara knowing what Gaara had just seen, knowing that a secret that had barely been born had already been laid bare. He coughed down a sob, holding it tight within until it hurt more than his heart. He forced his mouth to move. “I—I am.” </p><p>“Are you okay?” </p><p>He wasn't. He didn't think he'd ever be again. “No.” </p><p>“I'm so sorry.” </p><p>Lee shook his head, pressing his face against Gaara's chest as though that could prolong the inevitable. “Please, do not—do not try to make this better.” </p><p>Gaara's hand touched his hair, the gesture tentative and all the more painful for it. “Of course.” </p><p>They sat in silence for long moments, neither speaking, while Lee cried intermittently, waiting for the memory of the dream to fade. </p><p>It never did. </p><p>The dreams never faded, only what had come before the dreams, but this time Lee remembered snippets—moments with Gaara, the feel of Gaara's hand always in his, the smell of Gaara's skin, the look in Gaara's eyes, the way Gaara smiled—and the starkness of his feeling was overwhelming. </p><p>Somehow, within the span of dreaming, he'd fallen out of infatuation with Sakura and fallen deeply in love with Gaara of the Desert. And the moon knew. </p><p>And Gaara knew. </p><p>He sobbed, broken and heartfelt into Gaara's chest, clutching at him for dear life. He wished Gaara could forget everything he'd seen, wished he could go back to the moment right before he'd realized how desperately he wanted to kiss Gaara. Why had this happened? Why here? Why now? Why like this? </p><p>Gaara shushed him, almost awkward in his attempt to comfort Lee, but he never let him go. He held him tight, trying to soothe him as best he could. It was the worst waking he'd had yet—even worse than realizing he still couldn't use ninjutsu. </p><p>“Lee,” Gaara said, hours or days or weeks later. </p><p>Lee was sure he could cry forever, but for the first time, he felt tired. Exhausted. He wanted to sleep, truly sleep. And he didn't want to wake up. </p><p>“Lee,” Gaara tried again. </p><p>“What?” Lee managed pitifully. </p><p>Gaara was silent for a moment, breathing deep beneath Lee so that the sound of his lungs filled Lee's ear. He listened to the soothing rhythm of Gaara's heart beating, and willed his tears to stop. </p><p>“We should talk about this.” </p><p>Lee swallowed thickly, taking in a deep breath. “Can we not? P-please?” </p><p>Gaara touched his hair, tender and unsure, running a few strands between his fingers. “I wish we could.” </p><p>“I know.” If Gaara could, Lee was sure he would shield him from this pain. He was a good friend. </p><p>“Can you sit up?” </p><p>Lee forced himself to sit, forced himself to untangle from Gaara's arms, though their hands were still linked as they always were. Lee focused on their joined hands, afraid to meet Gaara's eyes. </p><p>“Lee.” </p><p>“Yes?” Lee asked, trying to forget the way the other Gaara had said his name. </p><p>Gaara sighed. “I... We need to figure out a system to keep you from confusing the dream of me with the real me.” </p><p>Lee nodded mutely. “The moon can hear us.” </p><p>Gaara leaned forward, pressing his mouth right against Lee's ear and whispering so quietly Lee had to rely on the shape of his mouth more often than the sound of his voice. </p><p>“Never look into my eyes again,” Gaara told him, so that the moon could not hear. “And never trust my kiss.” </p><p>Lee felt sure his heart would never mend. He'd known the moment he'd woken from his dream that Gaara would never love him, that it was an even more impossible dream than using ninjutsu, but to hear Gaara say so made the reality of waking all the more painful. </p><p>“Never let go of my hand,” Gaara went on against his ear, his mouth moving against the shell of Lee's ear like the kisses Lee had dreamed of. “And if I tell you 'I love you', kill me.” </p><p>Lee's heart thudded painfully against his chest, breaking with every beat. “I—I cannot do that.” </p><p>“You have to,” Gaara hissed into his hear, more hot breath than voice. “Please, Lee. You have to stay awake, at all cost. Don't ever let me convince you that my love is real.”</p><p>Lee wanted to ask if Gaara thought it would always be like that, but he couldn't bring himself to put voice to the words, and deep down, he knew Gaara couldn't give him that hope.</p><p>“I—what if it happens again?” </p><p>“I won't let you go,” Gaara promised, squeezing Lee's hand. “You came back to me this time. I'm sure I can bring you back again.” </p><p>Lee nodded mutely, squeezing Gaara's hand in return. His hand—his real hand—felt like sandstone, not like rose petals, and Lee burned the feel of it into his mind so he'd never be deceived again. </p><p>“I should get dressed.” He'd been so distraught he'd forgotten to think about his modesty until just then. </p><p>Gaara rose to his feet, hoisting a now clothed Lee bodily from the floor. “We should go somewhere else.” </p><p>“Anywhere,” Lee said, forlorn. He wanted to be in this place even less than Gaara. He didn't want any unnecessary reminders of what he'd dreamed. </p><p>“Where can we go?” Gaara asked, pulling Lee quickly from the bathroom and out of his bedroom before he could glance at the empty bed. </p><p>“Where would you like to go?” </p><p>“It doesn't matter. Anywhere you'd like.” </p><p>Lee wished Gaara wouldn't do that. He didn't want Gaara to offer him kindness like that, but he thought of a place, and the world swam. </p><p>“Where are we now?” Gaara asked. </p><p>Lee led him towards a large rock and sat down. They sat in an open clearing in the forests of Konoha, with the red sky in perfect view above them and the moon watching them. </p><p>“This was the first time anyone ever believed in me,” Lee said quietly. “Gai-sensei had found me training over there. I was close to giving up when he found me. I think he had been watching me for some time, but he never said anything until that day... We sat here after I had stopped crying, and he told me he believed in me.” </p><p>“He's a good man,” Gaara said beside Lee, pressing his shoulder against his. </p><p>“The best. I do not know what I would have done without him.”</p><p>“I was jealous of you because of him.” </p><p>Gaara was trying his best to distract Lee, and though it was useless, he played along. “You were?” </p><p>“He jumped in front of my sand when I was trying to kill you. He said you were important to him.” Gaara looked up at the sky, his profile illuminated by the red light of the moon so that his skin glowed pink in the night. “I couldn't understand how someone like you had so much—you'd gotten past my sand when no one else could, and you had someone who cared about you enough to stop me. </p><p>“I was envious. I think I hated you for having someone like that in your life.” </p><p>Lee pulled his knees up to his chest, resting his chin atop them and staring around the little clearing. “Gai-sensei and I are very similar. I think that is why I was able to succeed. He understood me.” </p><p>“I didn't. I couldn't. Not back then.” </p><p>“No, of course not. No one had tried to understand you.” </p><p>“That's not true—or it's only half true. My uncle—”</p><p>“The one who tried to kill you?” </p><p>“Yes.” </p><p>“But—but he tried to kill you.” </p><p>“I know.” Gaara half turned his head to look at Lee, watching him from the corner of his eyes. Lee kept his gaze low, avoiding Gaara's eyes. “But even if it wasn't real, he tried to understand me. At least, for a little while. It's what made his betrayal all the worse. I thought at least one person in the world loved me, and then he didn't.” </p><p>“He did not deserve to be your uncle,” Lee said. </p><p>“Perhaps, but I'll never know the real truth. If what my father said during the war about Yashamaru is true or if he was just trying to manipulate me. I'll always wonder if my uncle really did love me.” </p><p>Lee couldn't understand that. What was there to wonder? The man had tried to kill him when he'd been only a child. Whatever love he might have felt was null and void. </p><p>“I do not think it matters. If he could hurt you the way he did, then that is not love.” </p><p>“No one ever hurts those they love?” Gaara asked. </p><p>Lee went still, staring hard at the grass surrounding them. “That is not what I meant, but trying to kill someone you love... I could never do it.” </p><p>“And if you had to?” Gaara asked, reminding Lee starkly of the things Gaara had whispered to him. </p><p>Lee didn't answer. He couldn't. He knew what Gaara wanted him to say—that he could do it if he had to, but that felt like asking too much on the heels of Lee's revelation. How could Gaara ask this of him? How could Gaara think that Lee could kill him? </p><p>“I wouldn't ask you to do something if it wasn't necessary,” Gaara said into the silence. </p><p>“I know.” </p><p>“And I'm not asking you to kill the real me, only the illusion.” </p><p>Lee nodded, his tongue heavy in his mouth like a stone. “Hopefully we will figure out a way out of here before then.” </p><p>“We haven't discussed our plans in some time.” </p><p>“Have we come up with any plans in particular?” </p><p>“You'd suggested destroying the moon,” Gaara said wryly.</p><p>Despite everything, Lee managed to laugh. “That sounds like something I would say.” </p><p>“It could work, though.” </p><p>“You think so?” </p><p>“Do you remember when you dragged me here with you? When my dream was destroyed, the moon went with it.” </p><p>Lee remembered the way everything had shattered and how they'd fallen for what felt like an eternity. He'd woken up in another dream, but the details of that dream are a blank canvas in his mind. Gaara had told him, of course, but Lee didn't want to think about the dreams and his desire for intimacy.  </p><p>“You have not had a single dream since you came here.” </p><p>“I haven't,” Gaara confirmed. “That moon only affects you.” </p><p>“What if breaking it does not work, though?” </p><p>“We won't know unless we try.” </p><p>“Do you think it will let me? I mean, I know this is a dream, but if the moon controls everything, would I even be able to reach it?” </p><p>“I don't know, but do you want to wait for another dream to take you?” </p><p>Lee's stomach lurched, as though he were falling. “No.” </p><p>Of all the things Lee had dreamed of doing in his life, fighting the moon had certainly not been one of them. But if they were ever going to be free, and if Lee was ever going to have private feelings ever again, he'd have to try. </p><p>Lee met the moon's gaze, equal parts terrified that it would pull him back in and stupidly brave in the face of that fear. What else could the moon do to him? What could possibly hurt more than having feelings he'd barely realized thrown in his face? What could be more of a violation than the dream of an intimate moment with Gaara showcased to Gaara directly? What could be more heartbreaking than having the dream ripped from him? </p><p>The moon stared back at him, nestled in the sky among thin, red clouds, and glittering pink stars. </p><p>“If this works,” Gaara began. “We may not know it right away.” </p><p>“We will need to be on guard then.” Lee nodded decisively, narrowing his eyes. He crouched slightly, bending his knees and gracelessly pushing his chakra into his legs until the earth began to crack around him. The world went static, like the white noise over a radio frequency, as more cracks spider-webbed around his and Gaara's feet. Lee gripped Gaara's hand, grounding himself and holding on for dear life. </p><p>He opened a Gate—how many had he opened now? How was he sustaining active Gates? Was that the Moon's thrall, too?</p><p>Throwing caution to the wind, he opened another Gate. There was a resonating crack in the distance, like a log splitting in two, followed by a shrill screech. Lee did his best to ignore it, even as the sound corkscrewed into his eardrums and made them bleed. </p><p>“Lee!” Gaara shouted over the noise. “Do it, now!” </p><p>Lee launched them into the air, flying towards the moon with a force more impossible than anything he could have achieved outside the dream. Gaara had wrapped his arm around Lee, his face pressed against Lee's chest to keep from jostling as they rocketed through the sky. They weren't just sailing towards the moon on the strength of Lee's launch, they were flying. </p><p><em>“You grow bold, Rock Lee,”</em> the moon whispered. <em>“But I know the way to your heart.”</em> </p><p>The moon blinked out of existence, just as Lee drew upon it. </p><p>The static of the world danced around them, and a red mist sizzled below. The cracks in the world began repairing themselves, slowly knitting back together. </p><p>“Lee—”</p><p>“I know.” Lee dropped back to earth, falling like a comet towards the ground. </p><p>The impact rocked the foundation, sending waves of rock and trees flying around them like a tidal wave. The world hissed and growled, red static curling at their feet, but it wasn't enough. The moon still hung heavy in the sky. </p><p><em>“Sweet dreams, Rock Lee.”</em> </p><p>Lee whirled around, holding Gaara close as he raised his other arm to strike. </p><p>“Lee, wait—” Another Gaara stood before Lee, his eyes so impossibly green Lee knew it couldn't be real, but he froze anyways, as though the man before him had power over the muscles in his body. </p><p>“Ga—”</p><p>“No, Lee,” the real Gaara snapped in his ear. He stood before Lee, blocking his view of the illusion, pulling Lee's face close to his so that Lee's gaze was forced to meet Gaara's. “Don't look at him.” </p><p>Lee closed his eyes, pressing his forehead against Gaara's, tears heavy on his lashes. “I—I am so sorry, but I think it is too late.” </p><p>It was too late. </p><p>It will be too late. </p><p>It is too late. </p><p>The tears hanging against Lee's lashes are cool against his skin, and the returned pressure against his forehead is soothing. He opens his eyes, lashes fluttering, and meets Gaara's green, green eyes. </p><p>“May I introduce to you, the Kazekage's husband: Konoha's Beautiful Blue Beast, Rock Lee!” </p><p>Lee cannot bring himself to look at the cheering, whooping crowd. It doesn't feel real—marriage to another man would never be allowed in Konoha—but it is real. It's more real than anything Lee has ever experienced before in his life. </p><p>He half-laughs, half-sobs his joy, pulling Gaara in for a kiss. </p><p>“I still cannot believe this is happening,” Lee whispers against Gaara's lips. He tastes like rose petals and the sap from a tree, and his lips are as rough as sand paper, but Lee doesn't care. </p><p>“Believe,” Gaara says into the kiss, pressing close and wrapping his arms around Lee. “I'm the Kazekage. If I want to marry someone, who's going to tell me no?” </p><p>Lee laughs again, pulling back to take in Gaara in his black wedding kimono, which matches Lee's. He looks resplendent in the simple black kimono, and accompanying jacket and trousers. It's elegant and understated, and it makes Gaara's eyes all the greener. His eyes are Lee's favorite part about him; he could get lost in them for an endless eternity and be happy for it. </p><p>“Shall we, husband?” Gaara asks, gesturing to the aisle. Gaara's hand in his feels right, he knows every line on the palm and every crease in the knuckles even better than his own scars. He squeezes Gaara's hand, sure that he'll never be able to let it go, and they step down from the altar, and walk through the cheering crowd. </p><p>Suna is strangely green today. Trees have grown around her walls so that Lee almost feels like he hasn't left Konoha. It's an odd mix of the two terrains, but Lee doesn't question this because Gaara's hand in his fits so perfectly. </p><p>The red moon hanging over their ceremony stalks them back to their home, where they enter for the first time as husbands. </p><p>“How shall we spend our first night of marriage?” Lee asks, pulling Gaara close, fingers entwined so tightly it almost hurts. Gaara squeezes his hand harder, as if trying to tell him something, but his gaze is so green and so inviting, Lee doesn't need to hear what Gaara wants to know the answer.  </p><p>They go upstairs, Lee trailing behind Gaara who's got his hand in a vice-like grip, almost as strong as his sand. </p><p>Lee cannot help the laughter that escapes him, punch-drunk on the feeling of being Gaara's husband and what's waiting for them when they reach the bedroom. He tugs at the fingers being crushed in Gaara's grip, gently easing Gaara's hold on him. </p><p>“You do not need to worry, you know. I am not going anywhere.” </p><p>Gaara's hand only tightens in response, the action so contrary to the look in his eyes. “No, you're not going anywhere, Rock Lee. You're mine forever.” </p><p>“As long as you shall have me.” </p><p>“Until death,” Gaara whispers, leaning close to press a kiss to Lee's mouth.</p><p>“What about the next life? Will you meet me there, too?” </p><p>Gaara answers by pulling Lee into a searing kiss, throwing the bedroom door open and dragging Lee inside. Lee kisses him back in earnest, his hand slipping beneath Gaara's kimono jacket and sliding it from his shoulders. It crumples to the floor with a quiet sound, and Lee's own kimono jacket follows suit soon after, along with the rest of their clothes. </p><p>Lee spends an inordinate amount of time kissing every inch of Gaara's skin, tasting the leaves on him with every press of his lips. The moon hangs heavy, and Lee forgets time exists entirely as he loses himself in the press of his lips against Gaara's neck and sternum, his arms and hands, his legs and thighs, his stomach and back. He doesn't stop kissing Gaara, not even to breathe, and his head spins with the intoxicating smell of the forest and the earth around him, and the sound of Gaara's pleasure echoing in his ears. </p><p>“I love you, Rock Lee.” </p><p>Lee could spend the rest of his life making love to Gaara, and he plans to do just that. He places a tender kiss to Gaara's mouth, whispering into it, “I love you, too.” </p><p>It feels like they touch forever. Lee hardly recognizes where his pleasure starts and where Gaara's ends. All he knows is their bodies coming together, over and over, in an endless embrace, and the feeling of Gaara's hand in his, squeezing so tight it hurts. </p><p>“Lee!” Gaara gasps, throwing his head back. He gasps Lee's name so many times Lee loses count. It could have been years' worth of his name falling from Gaara's lips, it could have been a lifetime. </p><p>“Never stop touching me,” Gaara demands, pulling Lee to him again and again and again... </p><p>There is a moment when Lee wonders that they haven't grown tired, but it lasts for less than a second because Gaara stares up at him from the depths of their rose-red sheets with his green, green eyes, and Lee is lost to sensation all over again. </p><p>“I have never loved anyone so fully,” Lee breathes into a kiss. “How did you fall in love with me?” </p><p>“It's a dream, Lee.” Gaara's voice sounds unnaturally desperate, like he's teetering on the edge of a cliff without any chakra left to save him. Lee pulls back from the kiss to stare into Gaara's green eyes, and the world seems to spin for how green they truly are. </p><p>“What did you say?” </p><p>“That I've dreamed of this moment for so long,” Gaara whispers, but the words sound strange to Lee. </p><p>“You did? How long?” </p><p>“Since the moment I first saw you.” </p><p>Lee cannot help but laugh at that. “You wanted to kill me when we first met.” </p><p>“Yes,” Gaara breathes, pressing a kiss to Lee's jugular. “I could kill you now, if I wanted to.” </p><p>Lee freezes, holding still as though he's been caught within a predator's grasp. “Would you?” </p><p>“Not yet,” Gaara breathes. “I'm not hungry yet.” </p><p>Lee pulls back, and his hand hurts for how hard Gaara is squeezing it. “Gaara, let go.” </p><p>“I'll never let you go, Rock Lee. You're my husband, remember?” </p><p>Lee has never been scared of Gaara until this moment. He falls back onto the bed, scooting away from Gaara as quickly as he can with Gaara holding so tight to his hand. He doesn't want to hurt Gaara, but some part of him is screaming at him that he needs to fight. </p><p>“Why are you talking like this?” </p><p>Gaara crawls towards Lee on all fours, like a prowling cat. “Shh, dear husband. There's nothing to be afraid of.” </p><p>“Gaara, please.” </p><p><em>“Are you waking up, Rock Lee?”</em> Gaara asks, and the words echo around them like bells. <em>“Look at me, Rock Lee, and dream.”</em></p><p>Gaara's eyes are hypnotic. They almost appear to spin like jade tops within the dark sockets of his eyes, and Lee feels his mind pulled down, deeper and deeper and deeper until a red darkness crowds his vision. Gaara leans forward and captures his mouth in a kiss that draws blood from his tongue. </p><p>Lee's eyes flutter, lashes caked with sleep. He yawns, stretching his arms high above his head. Gaara sighs, his head pillowed against Lee's chest, his ring-adorned had resting lightly over Lee's heart. </p><p>“Good morning, husband,” Lee murmurs, pressing a kiss to the top of Gaara's head. “Did you sleep well?” </p><p>“Mhm, only because I am with you.” </p><p>Lee sighs, content to listen to the dulcet tones of Gaara's early morning affection forever. He misses Konoha sometimes, but he likes Suna. He likes being able to marry the man he loves without fear of recrimination or joblessness, and he likes being known as the Kazekage's husband. </p><p>Somewhere in their house, somewhere in their room, Lee hears the sound of desperate crying. </p><p>“Please, Lee, wake up.” </p><p>Lee lifts his head, but Gaara pushes him down with a kiss, climbing onto Lee and straddling his hips. “Do you know what I'd like to do, husband?” </p><p>Lee doesn't need any further distracting from the concerns that odd sound had stirred in him. He pulls Gaara down into another kiss, gripping Gaara's waist with as much strength as he can safely exert to control the motion of Gaara's hips. </p><p>Gaara nips at his bottom lip, purring into his mouth. “Do you like that, Rock Lee?” </p><p>Lee brings one hand up to tangle in Gaara's hair, the other throbbing with the pressure of Gaara's hand in his. For a moment, the pain is almost strong enough to pull his attention away from Gaara, but his husband holds his face in his hands, forcing Lee to meet his green, green eyes until he forgets everything else. </p><p>“Don't stop,” Gaara breathes, hands pawing at Lee's chest as he moves above him. </p><p>Lee sits up, pulling Gaara close so that they are chest to chest, and kisses him. </p><p>One of his fingers breaks, and he shouts into Gaara's mouth. </p><p>“I'm sorry, Lee,” Gaara says, somewhere beside him, while on top of him, Gaara's eyes blaze red. </p><p>Lee's finger throbs dully, the same hand Gaara had once crushed in sand, and so the pain is that much worse for all the prior nerve damage, and the shearing of his tendons as the Fifth Gate pulses through him. Tears well at the corners of Lee's eyes, and he holds his hand to his chest, even as Gaara refuses to let it go. </p><p>“Why—why did you do that?” </p><p>“Wake up.” </p><p>Lee has broken his fingers plenty of times while training, but this hurts more than all those times combined. It hurts so vividly that it brings Lee's awareness into focus, makes him realize there is another person in the room with him and his husband; makes him realize that someone else is holding his hand as though it is a lifeline. </p><p>He turns to see Gaara, his eyes bloodshot and his face tear-stained, but the Gaara on top of him grabs his face, pulling him to meet his gaze. </p><p>Lee can't take his eyes off the stricken look on Gaara's face though, even as his husband drops kiss after kiss upon his face. </p><p>“Rock Lee, look at me.” </p><p>“Gaara...” Lee says, staring straight into another man's eyes. His eyes aren't nearly so green, but they're more beautiful because of it. </p><p>“Lee,” Gaara croaks, his voice scratchy and broken. “Please, wake up.” </p><p>Around them, the world shudders, convulsing like a sickness. </p><p>“I do not understand,” Lee murmurs.</p><p>“Don't listen to him,” his husband says. “Look at me.” </p><p>“But—how are there two of you?” </p><p>“Please, remember, Lee,” Gaara begs, fresh tears falling down his face. </p><p>Lee has never seen Gaara cry, not in all the years they've been married. How long had they been married for now? He doesn't remember. It must have been years, yet neither of them looked any older. </p><p>“Please, do not cry,” Lee says, reaching up to wipe the tears from Gaara's face. </p><p>The moment his fingers brush Gaara's tears, memory floods him, the force rocking his body until he can't breathe. He gasps, collapsing against the bed, his body seizing as every nerve burns. </p><p>Lee screams. </p><p>Lee will scream. </p><p>Lee screamed with everything he had. He screamed so long and so loud his throat felt bloody and ragged. Gaara held his hand in his, careful of his broken finger, whispering apologies like prayers, over and over. </p><p>“Please, I'm so sorry, Lee.” </p><p>It felt like an eternity of pain, but the memories settled back where they belonged, the seams of his memory sealing itself once and for all. Lee panted, his body shaking with the aftershocks of pain and the continuous, constant, unrelenting surge of power from the Gates.</p><p>“Are you all right?” Gaara asked, pressing his forehead to the side of Lee's face. </p><p>Lee whimpered, swallowing down one last pitiful sob as he shook his head. “N-no.” </p><p>“I'm sorry,” Gaara said in his ear, his voice as ragged as Lee felt. “I tried. I tried so hard to wake you up.” </p><p>Lee could only nod his understanding. Now that the pain was receding, the reality of what he'd just lost settled over him, heavy as the weights he wore around his ankles. </p><p>He let out another sob, his heart shattered like the moon from Gaara's dream. “Why did you not let me be?” </p><p>“Lee—”</p><p>“I was happy.” </p><p>“It was a <em>lie</em>,” Gaara said, his voice caught between a sob and a growl. “It wasn't real. That wasn't <em>me</em>.” </p><p>“What does it matter? We have been trapped for so long! We are <em>never</em> getting out. Do you not see that?” </p><p>“So you tore me from my dreams of happiness for what?” Gaara shouted, tears falling down his face anew. “So I could watch you live out some fantasy with me? It's not <em>real</em>, Lee. It'll <em>never</em> be real.” </p><p>Lee felt as though Gaara had slapped him, and he crumpled, curling in on himself and letting out a wretched sob. He had no right to be mad at Gaara. It wasn't his fault that Lee was hurting. </p><p>“I-I am s-so-so-so—” Lee could barely speak through his tears, and he hiccuped on the words as he tried to force them out. “So s-sorry.” </p><p>Gaara's weight at his side made the bed dip, his other hand coming to rest in Lee's hair. “I know. I wish there had been another way.” </p><p>Lee shook his head, curling tighter around himself. “N-no, it—it is all right. I should not—I should have not have yelled at you.” </p><p>“Heartache makes us hurt those we care for,” Gaara murmured into Lee's hair. “I know that better than anyone.” </p><p>“I—” He didn't know what to say. There were no words in his vocabulary strong enough to express the depth of his grief or the power of his shame. </p><p>“I've never seen a Konoha wedding before,” Gaara said quietly, as if to distract Lee from his pain. </p><p>Lee closed his eyes tight against the memory of their fantasy wedding, wishing with everything he had that the memory would fade. “I-I have n-never been to one either, but I remember b-being young and seeing a couple get married. I-it was beautiful.” </p><p>“Suna's weddings are more colorful.”</p><p>Lee didn't want to ask, he didn't want the moon to have another opportunity to pull him back in with another taste of a love he could not have. </p><p>“Lee, are you still with me?” </p><p>Lee nodded. </p><p>“Could you say something?” </p><p>“What would you have me say?” </p><p>“Anything. I just want to know I haven't lost you again.” </p><p>“I am here. I promise.” </p><p>“Do... do you want to go somewhere else?” </p><p>Lee didn't want to move. “Not yet. I—I am so tired.” </p><p>“That's okay. We can stay here.” </p><p>Shame rose like bile in his throat and he coughed down a sob. “I am sorry. Y-you probably do not want to be here.” </p><p>“No,” Gaara said quickly, smoothing Lee's hair down with his free hand. “No, it's fine. We can stay.” </p><p>“But...” </p><p>“Don't, Lee. We can stay. There's nothing to be ashamed of.” </p><p>Lee couldn't bring himself to agree with that sentiment. There was everything to be ashamed of—his secrets had all been laid bare for Gaara to see, his scars, his body, his mind. There was nothing left of him that Gaara didn't know, and it was a wretched revelation to have the man he loved know him so completely without either of their consent.</p><p>Not for the first time, he cursed the moon and all she had wrought upon them. </p><p>“Lee,” Gaara said into the silence, some hours or days later. Perhaps it had been weeks or months, even. </p><p>“We can go,” Lee finally said, rising from the bed. His finger had healed awkwardly in Gaara's hand over the course of his quiet restitution, which could have meant any number of things that Lee didn't have the energy to figure out. </p><p>Gaara pulled away from Lee, his hand still holding Lee's, though far gentler now. He kept a respectable distance as Lee rose, his body clothed once again, and all of his scars covered like his secrets couldn't be. </p><p>“Do you know where you want to go?” Gaara asked, looking around what had once been their room. Lee wondered, briefly and horribly, what Gaara's bedroom actually looked like. </p><p>“Yes,” Lee said quietly, and the world hummed around them, shifting like puzzle pieces falling from a box. </p><p>They found themselves sitting atop the Hokage monument, staring out across the village Lee had called home his whole life. </p><p>“Why here?” Gaara asked.</p><p>“I like the view.” </p><p>Lee sat down, forcing Gaara to follow suit. </p><p>Above them the moon hung so low Lee thought he could hear the pull of her gravity. He ignored it, determined to never look at it again if he could help it. Eventually he'd find a way to destroy it, eventually he'd put an end to this torment. </p><p>“Are you still my friend?” Gaara asked into the silence. </p><p>Lee felt stricken, an ache smarting deep in his chest. “I would have thought you would not want to remain friends.” </p><p>“I value your friendship. That will never change.” </p><p>“Even now that you know I—I am...” </p><p>“You are what?” </p><p>Lee clenched his free hand into a fist. “I am in love with you.” </p><p>“Should I abandon our friendship? Is that what you want?” </p><p>“No.” </p><p>“Then why ask?” </p><p>“Most people would be disgusted.” </p><p>“Why?” </p><p>“Because we are both men.” </p><p>“Is that what it's like in Konoha?” </p><p>“Yes.” </p><p>“Suna is different.” </p><p>Lee was surprised by this. He turned his gaze to their clasped hands, swallowing down the million and one questions that crowded his mind. </p><p>“People can marry whoever they want in my village,” Gaara went on. “The weddings are beautiful, too. As Kazeakage, I attend most of them.” </p><p>“You said they are colorful.” </p><p>“They are. So colorful. It's different for me and my siblings. If we get married there's more ceremony involved, but even then it's still a joyous celebration. Color is everywhere at a Suna wedding.” </p><p>“What color do the bride and groom wear?” </p><p>“A Kazeakge's family wears blue, the color of Suna. The robes are similar to a kimono, I suppose. And they'd be embroidered with silver and beaded with glass and precious stones. The gender of the couple doesn't dictate the colors they wear, and only the Kazekage family is permitted to wear blue. Anyone else can choose their colors, but no one ever wears white. White is a symbol of death, and it would be considered a bad omen to wear white to a wedding in my village.” </p><p>“No white at all?” </p><p>Gaara shook his head. “The only white is the couples' robes before they're finished being dyed—and that's only for the Kazekage's family.” </p><p>“It sounds as though you will have a very beautiful wedding someday.” </p><p>Gaara cast a sidelong look at Lee, his expression a mask and his eyes shining in the red moonlight. “We shall see.” </p><p>“Do you not want to get married?” </p><p>“I never thought I'd be lucky enough to forge a bond like that with another.” </p><p>Lee hadn't considered that after everything Gaara had been through, perhaps love had not seemed possible to him. “I am sure that you will meet someone wonderful someday.” </p><p>“Why would you say that?” </p><p>“What do you mean?” </p><p>“You feel for me, yet you wish for me to marry another.” </p><p>“I wish for you to be happy. I know that happiness is not going to be with me.” </p><p>Lee could feel Gaara's eyes on him, the weight of his gaze as heavy as the moon's. </p><p>“I don't want to hurt you.” </p><p>“I never said you did, but sometimes it is inevitable. And I can still be happy for you, even if I am sad for myself.” </p><p>“Love shouldn't hurt.” Gaara's eye bore into Lee, begging him to look at him, but Lee remembered his warning from before. </p><p>“Sometimes, pain can be a good thing,” Lee said, flexing his free hand. “I have more scars than I can count, but I am not worse off for them. And when you broke my finger, it freed me from the dream I was trapped in.” </p><p>“And is this a scar you could bear?” </p><p>“I would bear it if it meant your happiness.” </p><p>“Lee.” Gaara's voice broke on his name, something fragile in the quiet way his name rolled off Gaara's tongue. It drew Lee's gaze to Gaara, unbidden and against his better judgment, but he was weak in the face of that sound. </p><p>“Please,” he said, staring at Gaara's mouth, trying to keep from looking into Gaara's eyes. “Please do not feel sad over this. I—I accept my feelings, and I accept that you do not feel the same.” </p><p>Gaara leaned forward, his mouth drawing nearer until Lee's vision was crowded with Gaara's eyes. The soft green of his eyes trapped Lee, caught him like an animal in a snare, and Gaara leaned forward, placing an awkward, tentative kiss to Lee's mouth. </p><p>Lee shoved him away, scrambling back and trying to put distance between them. “You—you are not Gaara.” </p><p>“Lee—”</p><p>“No! I will not fall for your lies anymore! If this is supposed to be my perfect dream, then why are you hurting me? Why!?” He turned to the moon, glaring at it for all he was worth. “I am not going to fall for this anymore! I will defeat you!” Without thinking, he tore open another Gate and whirled on Gaara. He met Gaara's green eyes as his fist flew, watched as the soft green of them went wide, reflecting the red, red moon.</p><p>He punched Gaara, and they both flew from the Hokage monument with the force of impact. Above them, the moon cracked as they plummeted towards the village. Lee pulled Gaara against his chest, flipping them in mid-air, and grabbing onto the monument with his free hand. </p><p>Gaara groaned against his chest, blinking dazedly up at him. “Lee...?” </p><p>“I am sorry I had to do that,” he whispered. He looked up at the cracking moon, watching as it slowly split in two. “I thought you were the moon.” </p><p>“It's what I asked you to do. At least you finally remembered.” </p><p>Lee couldn't help but smile. He nodded towards the moon, cracking like an egg above them. “Look.” </p><p>“You did it,” Gaara breathed. “How?” </p><p>“It was your eyes. I saw the moon in them.” </p><p>One half of the moon slid from the other, crumbling into the village below. Tiny meteorites showered Konoha, sending red fires to engulf Lee's home. The world around them trembled, red mist hissing from every surface as the dream began to dissipate. </p><p>“Gaara,” Lee shouted over the noise of the world ending. “If we do not remember this when we wake up—”</p><p>“We will!” Gaara shouted back.</p><p>“But—but if we do not—”</p><p>“Then we'll find a way to remember!” </p><p>“How?” </p><p>The world distorted, rippling around them like liquid glass. There was a shattering sound and an angry hiss, and Lee's vision flooded with the red mist of the dream until everything went black. </p><p>Everything will go black. </p><p>Everything goes black. </p><p>				__________________________________</p><p>Lee woke with his head throbbing, his muscles aching, and his nose bleeding. </p><p>Around him, there was burning bark, the smell of smoldering wood, and the weight of a body against his chest. He groaned, shifting beneath the person and tearing his eyes open, which were caked with so much sleep he had to pry his lids apart. He rubbed at his sleep-filled eyes and then wiped at the warm blood flowing from his nose with his free hand, which was red from energy of the Gates. His other hand was clasped tightly in another, his pinky curved oddly. </p><p>The body on top of his shifted, a soft noise of discontent sounding directly in Lee's ears. </p><p>Memories of a dream floated to the surface of his mind, and when he looked down he found a familiar head of red hair tucked into the crook of his neck. </p><p>“Ga—Gaara?” he croaked. His voice cracked horribly from disuse and the dry, smoky air around them. Lee let out a hacking cough, disturbing Gaara. </p><p>“Ugh,” Gaara grumbled, lifting his head. His own eyes were as caked with sleep as Lee's, the black rings around them now only the faint memory of bruises from a previous lifetime of sleepless nights. </p><p>“Are you—are you all right?” Lee asked, lifting a tentative hand to touch Gaara's cheek. </p><p>Gaara jerked back, shaking his head and rubbing at his eyes with his free hand. “I feel like shit.” </p><p>Lee's heart constricted as Gaara moved away, the fear that Gaara had forgotten gripping him as tight as Gaara still held his hand. “Do you—do you remember what happened?” </p><p>Gaara stopped moving, the heel of his palm pressed firmly against the eye Lee had punched in the dream. There was no bruise, no swelling, no burst blood vessels. It was a relief to know that he hadn't hurt Gaara.  </p><p>“Rock Lee?” Gaara stared down at him, as though just seeing him for the first time. </p><p>“You have forgotten,” Lee said, sadly. He'd wanted to ask Gaara about that last kiss—no, that first kiss. He'd wanted to ask Gaara if he felt the same, or if that kiss had been a part of some plan, or perhaps given out of pity. Now, he'd never know. </p><p>Gaara looked around, confusion heavy in the narrowing of his eyes. He struggled to his feet, pulling Lee up with him. </p><p>For the first time, Lee took in their surroundings.</p><p>The world was bathed in a faint pink light, but there was no moon in sight to reflect the Infinite Tsukuyomi. Far in the distance, a tree like nothing Lee had ever seen rose from the earth, reaching its branches skyward with a single heavy fruit hanging from its bough. The pink light emanated from the center of the tree, cast heavenward towards a black, starless sky. </p><p>Around Gaara and Lee, the battlefield they'd awoken in was wild and untended. Plants, flowers, and trees had grown out of control while they'd slept; the wild noises of animals echoed around them; and so many of the overgrown flora and fauna had rooted on top of odd-looking roots, wrapping tightly around each other in the shapes of bodies. </p><p>Lee looked back down at his feet, where he was standing in the twisted, burned remains of his own root-casket. Directly beside it, was another. </p><p>“These are our allies!” Lee shouted, realization dawning. He let go of Gaara's hand for the first time in he didn't know how long, racing towards one of the tangles of roots. </p><p>“Wait! We don't know what will happen if you let them out.” </p><p>“But they need our help!” </p><p>“We need to stop the genjutsu first! There's no way of knowing if those roots are keeping everyone alive.” Gaara looked ragged and disoriented, but his expression was fiercely determined as he met Lee's gaze.</p><p>Lee's heart was in his chest, the muscles around his ribs tight with anxiety and the weight of Gaara's eyes on him. His eyes were their usual soft green, like sea foam or jade, and the recognition of what they'd endured together was missing. </p><p>“What do we do?” </p><p>“We kill it,” Gaara said, pointing towards the tree. “We destroy whatever is sending that light towards the moon.”</p><p>“How? We do not even know what that is!” </p><p>“We have to try.” Gaara didn't wait for further discussion. He grabbed Lee's hand, the gesture so unconscious it made Lee's heart ache, and began leading them towards the tree through the tangled forest the world had become. Far in the distance, the tree groaned, the sound resonating all across the land.</p><p>“It knows we are awake,” Lee murmured. </p><p>Gaara stopped them in their tracks, stepping closer to Lee. “Something's coming.” </p><p>At their feet, the earth began to tremble. A cracking sound raced towards them, and when Lee looked he saw the earth splitting as a massive root raced towards them. </p><p>“Gaara!” He grabbed Gaara around the waist, launching them into the air as the root shot towards them. </p><p>Gaara's sand raced after them, forming a platform beneath Lee's feet. He touched down, releasing Gaara as the sand solidified. Below them, the root flailed, extending itself towards them as far as it could go. The earth shook again, the ground breaking as the root grew, lengthening towards them. </p><p>“Hang on!” Gaara shouted. The sand platform shot forward, and below them the earth roared as roots ripped themselves from the dirt, creating a writhing forest for Gaara and Lee to fight their way through. </p><p>“Do you think the others are all right down there?” Lee asked over the noise of the shaking earth and the shrieking tree. </p><p>“I don't know.” Gaara jerked his arms, pushing the sand platform higher to avoid the thrashing roots. </p><p>All around the tree, roots had erupted from the earth, waving too and fro, a thicket of grasping tendrils waiting to ensnare them once again. </p><p>“We need to destroy the roots,” Gaara murmured. “Then we can get to the tree.” </p><p>“I think we can manage that.” Lee closed his eyes and opened the Seventh Gate for the first time. “<em>Kai!</em>”</p><p>Gaara watched him with wide eyes, something flashing in their jade depths. “I'll cover you.” </p><p>Lee barely had the chance to acknowledge Gaara's help before sand was slithering around him. A familiar dread coiled in his stomach as the sand wound up his legs, but it spread itself thin, stretching across his entire body before hardening—an exoskeleton of sand. </p><p>“What—”</p><p>“It's my armor,” Gaara told him. “I'll be right behind you.” </p><p>Something in Lee's chest constricted—a heart aching for another—but he nodded without comment. His body burned, sweat pouring from him beneath the sand. There was no time to waste. In the blink of an eye, he launched himself from the platform, speeding towards the roots below like a meteor. </p><p>Gaara's sand was a heavy weight around him, but Lee had foregone his weights early on in the war and the sand didn't compare. A root crashed into him, sending him flying to the ground with a resonating crash. He broke through the earth, falling deeper into her crust, before he could stop himself. </p><p>He thrust his arms out, catching himself in the lifeless roots of average trees, and pulled himself up, crouching low as he mentally checked his body for injury. The sand had held strong against the roots. Lee grinned. </p><p>The earth shook around him, and high above he could hear the groan of the roots. </p><p>He focused his chakra, like forcing gravity to behave contrary to its purpose, and launched himself from the earth with a resounding explosion.</p><p><em>“Morning Peacock!”</em> Lee's arms exploded into motion, fire raining down from them as he sailed through the forest of roots. </p><p><em>“Eeeeee!”</em> </p><p>The high pitched shriek of the roots echoed as flames roared to life, engulfing everything in Lee's path. Above him, Gaara sailed above, slicing his arms through the air. His sand arched in a sharp curve, glittering like a blade as it soared with deadly accuracy towards the roots. Pieces of root rained down as they were cut, falling into the growing fires below. </p><p>“Rock Lee!” Gaara's warning was almost too late, but Lee whirled just in time. </p><p>A root came swooping down on him, and he flipped before launching into another series of high speed punches. Fire roared towards it, overtaking the root and turning it to ash in a matter of minutes. </p><p>“Thanks!” Lee shouted, grinning for all he was worth. It felt like a lifetime since he'd moved like this—his muscles sang with the effort and his heart pumped with adrenaline. He felt alive, he felt invigorated. He whooped, falling towards the earth and landing with a crash. He launched himself into the air again with such force the earth caved in beneath his feet. </p><p>As he rose high into the air, a red beam of light rippled out through the forest of roots, knocking Lee from the sky. </p><p>Sand caught him before he could crash land, raising him up on a platform. </p><p>“Are you all right?” Gaara asked from his own platform. </p><p>Lee gave him a thumb's up. </p><p>“Your sand makes good armor,” he shouted back. “But I already knew that.” </p><p>Gaara's expression was grim as he faced off against the roots, apparently satisfied that Lee was uninjured. “This isn't enough. We'll never get through at this rate!” </p><p>Lee looked up at the moonless sky, a memory from the dream coming to him. “The moon—it is a new moon! Gaara, the jutsu is weak because of the moon!” </p><p>“Then we only have a few days before it regains its strength.” Gaara's gaze slid across the writhing forest of roots, looking for an opening within. The fire continued to spread, but it hadn't gained enough momentum, and Lee realized with mounting dread that their friends and allies were still down there. </p><p>“Gaara! You have to put out the fire! Everyone—everyone who has not woken is still trapped!” </p><p>Gaara straightened, lifting his arms before him. The earth groaned as a tidal wave of sand reared up, crashing into the forest and suffocating the flames. Gaara jerked his arms, and the sand scattered, slicing through more of the forest, sending roots toppling to the earth. </p><p>A path was slowly being cleared for them, but it still wasn't enough. </p><p>“What can we do?” Lee called, desperate. “There are too many roots! And if we burn them, it could kill our comrades!” </p><p>“My sand won't be enough on its own,” Gaara said. “We have to get to the center of this. Maybe I can clear you a path—you're fast enough that you could get through this without them touching you!” </p><p>“What about you? I need you by my side!” </p><p>Gaara stared at Lee, confusion wrinkling his brow. “I—”</p><p>There was a deafening screech, and the red light beyond the grasping roots pulsed. It glowed brighter and more sinister, and a voice echoed from within. </p><p><em>“It's time to sleep.”</em> </p><p>“Shit,” Gaara breathed. </p><p>“I have an idea!” Lee cried. “During the Chūnin exams you made a ball around yourself using your sand! What if you did that now? We could sail right through the roots without them touching us!” </p><p>“My sand might not be fast enough!” </p><p>“We have to try something! If we fall asleep again, we may never break free!” </p><p>“How did we before?” </p><p>“I—” </p><p>There was a cataclysmic force that knocked them both back as another pulse rocked from the center of the forest. </p><p>“There's no time! We'll try your idea!” Gaara jumped onto Lee's platform as sand swirled, coalescing around them until it blocked out all light. “Hang on.” </p><p>The ball shot forward at incredible speed, though it was nothing compared to Lee's fastest, and rocked as it soared through the forest. Roots crashed against it, and in the darkness Lee reached for Gaara, grabbing his hand for comfort. </p><p>“We're almost there,” Gaara said tightly. He squeezed Lee's hand, responding to the comfort Lee offered with his own. </p><p>“We will make it—”</p><p>The ball of sand went crashing to the earth, a hairline crack forming at its center and letting red light seep in. </p><p>“Lee!” </p><p>Lee's heart choked him, and he grabbed Gaara, pulling him close. “Hold on to me!” </p><p>He concentrated his chakra and the ball of sand crashed around them as Lee ripped through it and the roots that had trapped them. Flames roared to life again in his wake, and Gaara's sand trailed far behind them as they rose up into the air. </p><p>“Are you all right?” Lee asked, his voice resonant. </p><p>Gaara had a cut just above his eye and he was breathing heavily. “I'm okay. You—are you okay?” </p><p>“I will be fine,” Lee assured him, even though his body protested. He was beginning to feel the impact of having activated the Gates in his sleep, of opening the Seventh Gate for the first time without enough training, of whatever else the dream had done to him. He would face the consequences of that if they survived the battle. “We are at a disadvantage, though. Our allies are down there, and our best hope of fighting is fire.” </p><p>“I know,” Gaara murmured. He let out a shaky breath, gripping Lee tighter. His sand finally settled beneath their feet. “We're closer than before, but I don't think my sand will be fast enough.” </p><p>“You were able to cut the roots,” Lee said. “What if you made another big wave and made a path through them?” </p><p>Gaara glanced at Lee, his gaze taking him in slow and steady. “I have a better idea.” </p><p>“What is it?” Lee asked eagerly. </p><p>Gaara held his hand out, summoning sand to it. As the sand solidified, a weapon Lee recognized formed: a three-sectioned staff, a coiling dragon staff.</p><p>“With your speed, you could cut a path through the forest. You'll be faster than me, especially with the Seventh Gate—” His voice hitched, something shining in his eyes. “I can make this as strong as you need, and I can extend the length as much as you need.” </p><p>“Will you stay close?” </p><p>“I will, but I won't be able to keep up with you.” Gaara passed Lee the staff. </p><p>Lee took it, almost reverently, feeling along its smooth surface. Chain links formed between the sections, so that either end fell around the center. The sand grew heavier, pressure building up in every grain as Lee passed it between his hands. He folded it up, gripping it tightly. “This feels strong.” </p><p>“Good. Let's go.” </p><p>Lee jumped from the platform, and Gaara soared behind him, raising his arms to call more sand to him. </p><p>Lee landed with a crunch of earth. He extended his arm with the staff and released the two ends so that he held the center. The staff's ends fell to the earth with a thud, longer than most coiling dragon staffs. The roots swayed around him, moving in at his arrival. </p><p>With careful motions, the Seventh Gate pulsing through his body, Lee took up a stance, gripping the staff around the base of either end of the center. </p><p>He launched himself forward at such speed that he broke the barrier, and sent roots crashing to the earth without even touching them. He twirled the staff in deadly arcs as he raced through the tangle of roots rising from the earth, striking in every direction all at once. Air pressure built around him with the speed and force, a cocoon surrounding him that the roots couldn't breach. </p><p>He spun and twirled, bringing the staff down with echoing crashes that cleaved whole roots at their base. </p><p>The forest crumbled around him, and when he stopped for a beat, he could see Gaara high above, waving his hands and slicing them through the air, cutting down his own sections of the battling roots. </p><p>Lee picked up speed again, standing in place, and building up the momentum of the staff until he could smell ozone. A trail of flames sparked with every scrape of the staff against the earth, and a ball of air built around it until Lee's hands burned. </p><p>He let out a shout, bringing the staff down before him and sending the air slicing through roots. Everything in his path tumbled, and the tree at the center of it all appeared. </p><p>“Gaara! I see it!” </p><p>“GO!” He raised his arms high above his head, and a wall of sand rose up on either side of Lee, sheltering him from the roots. </p><p>Lee crouched down, holding the staff at his side, and took off. </p><p>A sonic boom rent the air as he raced past the walls of sand, and a trail of fire erupted in his wake. At this feet, the flames burned the sand until it turned to molten glass that shattered beneath his feet. He burst from the thick wall of roots, flying towards the massive tree and the glowing light at its center. </p><p><em>“Are you ready to dream again, Rock Lee?”</em> </p><p>Lee raised the staff into the air, and brought it swinging down. The earth cracked, a fissure running towards the tree, whose red light pulsed like a heartbeat. </p><p>“I am not afraid of you,” Lee growled. </p><p><em>“Aren't you?”</em> the tree asked. It's light grew, and a figure materialized from its trunk. It pulled itself from the depths of the tree, rising until Gaara stood before it. </p><p><em>“I know all that you desire,”</em> the dream of Gaara told him. <em>“I know all that you want, all that you crave, all the things you earn for.”</em> </p><p>“That does not matter here! We are not in your world anymore!” </p><p>There was a rumbling like laughter, deep and resonant. <em>“Look around, Rock Lee. This is my world. It's been my world for one-hundred long years. What makes you think</em> you<em> can stop me?</em>” </p><p>Lee blanched, taking a step back. “A—a hundred—no, that is wrong! You are lying!” </p><p>That strange, sinister laugh rumbled beneath his feet. <em>“Am I? Look at the world, Rock Lee? Or perhaps it would help if you saw your village?”</em> </p><p>The red light shimmered, an image of an unfamiliar village overrun with trees and dilapidated buildings stretching before him. On the distant horizon, he could see the crumbling Hokage monument. </p><p>“That—that is a lie! That is not real!” </p><p><em>“Such denial,”</em> Gaara of Dreams purred. <em>“Like how you denied your feelings for him for so long. Do you know how many years it was before you realized? Do you know how many years you spent dreaming of kissing him? Of sharing your bed with him?”</em> </p><p>“NO!” Lee swung the staff, and the sand stretched towards the tree, coming down with a snap of root. The tree screamed, and the image of Gaara blurred and bled. </p><p>Roots shot up from the earth, wrapping around Lee's ankles and pulling him down. </p><p>Above Lee, a shadow fell, and a hand of sand pulled him from the clutches of the tree, bringing him to safety. </p><p>“Are you all right?” Gaara asked, narrowing his eyes at the flickering dream of himself. “What's that?” </p><p>Tears burned at the edges of Lee's eyes, the agony of his dreams washing over him anew. He settled next to Gaara on the platform, gripping the staff tighter in his hand. “That is just a dream.” </p><p><em>“You're right, Rock Lee. It is</em> just<em> a dream. Gaara of the Desert could never love you.”</em> </p><p>Lee couldn't bring himself to look at Gaara, afraid of what he'd see in his eyes. Below, Gaara of Dreams shifted, raising a hand in perfect imitation of the real Gaara. Roots burst from the earth, and their platform of sand only barely dodged, climbing higher and higher into the sky. </p><p>The earth rumbled, the tree's laughter echoing through the ground. </p><p><em>“You can't escape. You will never escape.”</em> </p><p>At the center of the tree, a massive flower sat with an eye at its heart, radiating red light. It was unlike any Sharingan Lee had ever seen, and he quickly averted his gaze. </p><p>“We cannot look at it—”</p><p><em>“Too late,”</em> Gaara of the Dream's voice echoed. </p><p>At his side, Gaara collapsed, and the sand platform and his staff disintegrated. Lee grabbed Gaara as they plummeted towards the thrashing roots, which rose up to meet them, snatching the two and wrapping around them tightly. </p><p>Lee screamed, pushing his already overwrought body to beyond its limit. The Seventh Gate was still coursing through him, and he yanked his limbs free, ripping roots with every pull. But there were too many, and he couldn't let go of Gaara. </p><p><em>“Look. At. Me.”</em> </p><p>A root wrapped around his face, forcing him to look up as the rest pulled his body towards the eye at the center of the tree. Lee closed his eyes, tight, clenching his jaw as the roots tightened their hold, squeezing until blood vessels burst from the pressure. </p><p><em>“Stop fighting this. What can a man like you do? No ninjutsu. No genjutsu. All you have is your fists and your pure heart. And what good is that, Rock Lee? What good is trying?”</em> </p><p>“I. Will not. Let you. Win,” Lee ground out. The red light illuminated the darkness of his eyelids, and he wrenched an arm free, ripping the root from his face. In his other arm, Gaara slept, soundless and peaceful. He was Gaara's only hope. </p><p><em>“You could finally have him. If you just let yourself go. Just let us have you. Let your dreams be real.”</em> </p><p>Tears streamed down Lee's face. Maybe the tree was right? Maybe there really was no way for him to overcome this; maybe he really was too weak to win. </p><p>“You will kill us,” Lee whispered, touching Gaara's sleeping face with a bloody hand. </p><p><em>“Eventually,”</em> the tree said. <em>“Not yet. I have to ration, after all, if I want to live.”</em> </p><p>“Then—our friends! Are they—”</p><p><em>“Dead? Oh, yes, some of them are dead. Some of them are dying. Some of them are as alive as you and Gaara.”</em> </p><p>Lee's chest felt tight with grief, with the weight of the knowledge that they'd failed. </p><p>“I am so sorry, Gaara,” he said, tremulously. </p><p><em>“That's it, Rock Lee. Give up. Give in. Dream.”</em> </p><p>The roots wrapped around Lee and Gaara, holding them close together. Lee pressed his forehead to Gaara's, tears falling freely, as the red light bled through the gaps in the roots. Lee finally looked up, meeting the strange Sharingan's gaze. </p><p>A memory rose to the surface as Lee fell back into the dream.</p><p><em>“Don't you fight in your sleep?”</em> </p><p>And Lee slept. </p><p>Lee will sleep. </p><p>Lee sleeps. </p><p>				__________________________________</p><p> </p><p>Lee wakes with a cold feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach. </p><p>The warm hand on his chest feels real, but some part of him knows it's a lie. Some part of him knows he's dreaming and that he needs to fight it. Another part of him doesn't want to fight anymore. He just wants to be happy, he just wants to let it all wash over him. </p><p>“Are you awake?” Gaara's voice is a gentle caress against his face, his breath ghosting Lee's cheek like a kiss. </p><p>“I am,” Lee breathes back. He tries to remember how they wound up here, tangled around one another in a warm bed, but he can't. The memory isn't there. </p><p>“Rock Lee.” Gaara's voice is a murmur, a confused lilt to it, almost like he's real. </p><p>Lee finally opens his eyes, meeting sea foam rolling upon the banks of the beach. Gaara's eyes are soft, but filled with a harsh confusion. Lee blinks, memories trying to crowd his conscious mind. He feels the tendrils of them curling around him like vines, like the roots of a tree, but he can't quite grasp them. </p><p>“Hi,” he whispers into the stillness between them. </p><p>“What's happening?”</p><p>“I—” Lee knows the answer. It tugs at him like weights pulling him down to the earth. It surges through him like the Gates. It claws at him, digs at his skin, breaks his bones until the truth of it all aches so deeply. He is raw. He is broken. He is tired. </p><p>All he wants is to be splendid, for someone to know that he is splendid, for someone to love him for all the scars it's taken him to become splendid. He doesn't want to fight anymore. </p><p>His eyes fill with tears, his lip trembling. “I gave up.” </p><p>“That's not like you.” </p><p>Lee lets out a bitter laugh, shaking his head. “You do not know me. Not truly.” </p><p>Gaara pushes himself up, hovering over Lee. “I remember.” </p><p>Lee's eyes go wide. “What?” </p><p>“I know why we're here.” </p><p>“I—” He feels trapped by the words, by the accusation in them, and he can't find his voice to defend himself. There is no defending himself. </p><p>“Lee.” </p><p>“Gaara.” </p><p>“Wake up.” </p><p>Lee wakes. </p><p>Lee will wake. </p><p>Lee woke. </p><p>And Lee cried. </p><p>“I thought you would fight it.” </p><p>“I tried,” Lee admitted weakly. “But—but everyone is dying, and I—I cannot do what needs to be done.” He held his hands loosely in his lap, staring at his useless, scarred hands. </p><p>Gaara's hands found his, wrapping his fingers around Lee's. “You brought me back here.” </p><p>“What?” </p><p>“I was dreaming,” Gaara told him. “But when you went to sleep, you pulled me here with you.” </p><p>Lee bit his lip, stopping himself from asking the question that bubbled immediately to the surface: Was I in your dream? </p><p>Gaara's hand came up to rest on Lee's cheek, wiping his tears. “You were in my dream.” </p><p>Lee couldn't fight the sob that had been trying to break free from him since before he'd returned to the dream, and he let it out, falling from him like rocks falling down a mountain. He dropped his head into his hands, ashamed.</p><p>“Lee,” Gaara tried, touching his hair. “Don't you see.” </p><p>“I can see nothing,” Lee sobbed. “Nothing but my failure.” </p><p>“You haven't failed,” Gaara whispered, pressing a kiss to Lee's head, stopping the tears in their tracks. </p><p>Lee lifted his head slowly, carefully, almost afraid of what he would see when he looked into Gaara's eye. “You...” </p><p>“It's me, Lee.” Gaara's eyes were the same. They weren't greener than green had any right to be. They were pure jade, cut and polished; they were the sea foam rising and falling along with the tide; they were peace and quiet; they were filled with love. </p><p>“But...” </p><p>“I told you before that I'd never kiss you because the dream was dangerous. I thought if it knew how I felt, it would only make it easier for you to be trapped in it.” </p><p>Lee shook his head, reaching up to touch Gaara's cheek. “You did not remember. When we woke, you did not remember.” </p><p>“I know,” Gaara murmured, turning his face into Lee's hand. “I know, and I might not remember when we wake again, but this feeling won't disappear just because I've forgotten. So please, don't give up.”</p><p>“But... it is too late. We are both trapped again.” </p><p>“No, we're not. Lee, I'm here because of you. You—you are so special, and you don't even see it.” </p><p>Lee had always needed others to tell him how to see himself, he'd always needed others to hold up the looking glass for him. Gai, Tenten, Neji, Naruto, Sakura.... They had all been ways of seeing himself, of understanding himself, of loving himself. But Gaara was different. He had to be different because Lee loved him—really, truly loved him in ways he'd never imagined loving another person. He hadn't known love could be like this, he'd always just been living on the dream of it. </p><p>But now he had the real thing, and he wouldn't let it go. </p><p>“I—what do I need to do?” </p><p>“It's already surging through you,” Gaara said placing a hand over his heart. “It's here. That's the answer.” </p><p>Lee's heart thudded beneath Gaara's hand, and the answer came to him, as clear as the blue sky that was the ceiling of their room. </p><p>“The Eighth Gate.” </p><p>Gaara smiled, leaning forward to kiss Lee. “Do you know what it is?” </p><p>“The Gate of Death.” </p><p>“No. The Gate of Dreaming.” </p><p>Lee had never heard of such a thing, but if the Eighth Gate was the answer, he would accept that without fear or hesitation. “You do not have to make this easier for me.” </p><p>“I'm not,” Gaara assured. “We're not in the waking world, Lee. We're in a dream, and you've already opened the Seventh Gate. You’ve spent the last century slowly opening the Gates, and using the God Tree to heal and strengthen your body against the damage from the Gates. Didn’t you wonder why your body didn’t hurt?” </p><p>“I did, but how do you know all this?” </p><p>“Because you told me.” </p><p>“I do not recall that.” </p><p>“In the space between waking and dreaming, the space you don't remember. That's where we found our answers.” </p><p>“How—how do I know this is real?” Lee asked, suddenly doubting the green of Gaara's eyes. </p><p>“Do you think I'm the dream?” </p><p>“I—I might.” </p><p>Gaara hesitated, looking away from Lee to stare up at the sky. “The moon is gone.” </p><p>“What?” Lee followed Gaara's gaze to the sky, searching for proof. Sure enough, the moon was no where to be found. </p><p>“You destroyed it like you destroyed the one in my dream.” </p><p>“I remember, but... if it is gone, how are we still here?” </p><p>“Do you know where here is?” </p><p>“No.” </p><p>“It's the space between. The space where we found our answers.” </p><p>“I do not think you are really Gaara.” </p><p>“I am,” Gaara promised, and then, “And I'm not. I'm the part of Gaara that is wholly at peace with myself and the world. It's a small part, but it's there. Or rather, here.” He gestured around them, turning to smile at Lee again. It was a genuine smile, not a lie, not a dream. There wasn't a hint of danger in it. </p><p>“You are the part of Gaara that loves me.” </p><p>“I am.” </p><p>“But you—he—when I do this, will you remember?” </p><p>“I will only have a vague sense of our dreams, Lee,” he said, sadly. “If you want me to love you in the world, you have to remind me.” </p><p>“But—how could I just—that is a lot to dump on someone!” </p><p>“Do not tell me the details of these dreams. Do all the things we did here, out there.” </p><p>“Except for fighting the moon,” Lee said, cheekily. </p><p>Gaara chuckled. “Yes, I don't think we'll need to fight the moon. Not once this is over.” </p><p>“I—I believe you... I think.” </p><p>“That's good. Do you need me to show you what to do?” </p><p>Lee shook his head. He already knew. He'd always known. It was the only reason he could possibly trust this strangely serene version of Gaara, this version of Gaara that loved him the way he wanted to be love, this version of Gaara that smiled the way Lee wanted to see Gaara smile. If he hadn't known, in some small part of his soul, he wouldn't be doing this. </p><p>He held his thumb over his heart, closed his eyes, and let out a slow, soothing breath as he pushed his thumb against that deadly point in his chest. </p><p><em>“Kai!”</em> </p><p>The world inverted, Lee's body sang like never before, and the pain of his ruptured muscles eased as the world around him changed.</p><p>Gaara stood at his back, dazed and disoriented, and not at all the serene version Lee had just spoken to. Before them, the God Tree sat, bathed in the red light of the Infinite Tsukuyomi. </p><p><em>“What's this?”</em> the tree called. At it's highest bough, the chakra fruit swayed, like a warning. </p><p>All around Lee, a steam rose from his body, but instead of the red Steam of Blood, it was a white light that fractured with color every time Lee moved so that rainbows fell around him. He had become the living embodiment of his uncooperative chakra, and it poured from in him in a stream of light. </p><p>“You are no longer the one in control,” Lee told the tree. Power surged through him, unlike anything he'd ever felt. It flowed differently, like water in a creek; like the blood in his veins; like sand in an hour glass. It pulsated around him, pulsated through him until he was like a supernova of light and energy. </p><p>The tree shrank, its eye rolling wildly. </p><p>“It is time for you to dream.” </p><p>Lee moved—not with speed, but with spirit; not with sound, but with gravity. His strength had superseded the limits of his knowledge of the word strength; his chakra was more than light or energy; his body beyond the touch of death. With the barest motion, he pierced the center of the tree, where its red eye sat, crying bloody tears. A blue fire roared around it until the red light of the Tsukuyomi was swallowed whole. The light surged, radiating towards the sky and blanketing the world in soft blue, like the light at dawn, just before waking from a dream.</p><p>And the world woke. </p><p>And the world will wake. </p><p>And the world finally wakes.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><a href="https://sagemoderocklee.tumblr.com/post/636100904659107840/and-for-the-no-excuses-game-how-about-last-and">I wrote a PoV shift on tumblr for a portion of this fic!</a> It's from the last dream sequence where Lee marries the dream Gaara. As a warning, the issues of consent are for more present from Gaara's PoV, so read with caution!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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